Ask MeFi - follow up edition December 10, 2018 12:44 PM   Subscribe

I'm sure that I'm not alone in wondering how things work out in the case of particularly interesting Ask.MeFi posts.

Has the concept of formally revisiting popular Ask. posts been floated before? It is a very podcast-y idea, so maybe it belongs in that format, but maybe there's a way of having some Ask page posts be moderated follow up "Whatever happened..." bonus features where the OP gives an update.
posted by Glomar response to Feature Requests at 12:44 PM (90 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite

There is! If you asked a question, there will be a "final update" link at the bottom where you can submit a follow-up one time even after the question is closed. (This actually just sends the update to us so that we can post it manually, avoiding potential spam or other weirdness.)
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 12:45 PM on December 10, 2018 [5 favorites]


I would LOVE to see how some of these Asks turned out. Did they take our advice? Did they DTFM?
I don't see a lot of closure; maybe a gentle reminder could be sent a few weeks later, via MeMail, to invite them to give us all an update if they so desire?
posted by Major Matt Mason Dixon at 12:59 PM on December 10, 2018 [2 favorites]


That reminder MeMail already happens.
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 1:05 PM on December 10, 2018 [5 favorites]


Time for a thread for updates then! I love those threads.

I just added a late update to a question I asked a while ago about finding as website or app that could make a nice readable page from a set of Keynote slides (i.e. not a PDF and not "Here are my slides") At the time no one knew if there was a thing that existed besides "Well you can learn Python and then run this script..." No thank you. But recently I found Keynote Exporter and now I can do the thing. I used it recently for a talk I gave to rave reviews. I added a final update.
posted by jessamyn (retired) at 1:45 PM on December 10, 2018 [4 favorites]


Maybe I'm just really nosy but I'd especially like to see how things turned out for anonymous questioners. I wish there was a way for Anonymous questioners to leave a final update. Or perhaps, if they want, they could out themselves with an update. After a while the need for anonymity might fade.

And to show good faith: this was an anonymous ask from me. Mefites helped me to see that there wasn't a perfect solution to my problem but I had to work through it.
I kept the dog and keeping her was the best decision of my life.
posted by Elly Vortex at 1:46 PM on December 10, 2018 [20 favorites]


As said above, feature exists.

I always try to update my AskMes even if I find my answer elsewhere.
posted by terrapin at 1:55 PM on December 10, 2018


- i got a new laptop
- i got the fancy felt bins from that guy in ukraine
- some of those books were not what i was looking for
- my hair grew back completely and is now actually kind of out of control wrt how fast it grows
- the cat did not like his sweater
posted by poffin boffin at 2:20 PM on December 10, 2018 [35 favorites]


My questions are all really mundane and usually have unsatisfying updates. The only anon one I've asked recently was a) boring b) about my finances which I feel weird about discussing with y'all and c) ended up being totally irrelevant because my timeline changed before I could even take any of the advice.

Otherwise the house is great, the septic system hasn't given us any trouble, and I think I'm going to get the guy who'll be treating our cedar siding in the spring to do whatever he's gonna do to our exterior doors.
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 2:25 PM on December 10, 2018 [2 favorites]


posted by Nonsteroidal Anti-Inflammatory Drug at 2:55 PM on December 10, 2018 [9 favorites]


somebody once asked a question that revealed all the symptoms of appendicitis, and everybody said go, go, go to the doctor, get out of here

and we never found out what happened
posted by Countess Elena at 2:57 PM on December 10, 2018 [44 favorites]


Christ, I remember reading that thread. It was awful. The worst part was that the woman's parents actually told her she shouldn't go to the emergency room because it would be too expensive, and that's why she didn't go.
posted by holborne at 3:13 PM on December 10, 2018 [8 favorites]


i'm horribly fiendishly tempted to falsely claim various terrible anon asks as my own, knowing that the mod anon secrecy statute will make them hesitant to double check my LIES AND UNTRUTHS
posted by poffin boffin at 3:23 PM on December 10, 2018 [8 favorites]


I try to follow up, if there's anything discernible to follow up about.

• My boss bought me a better mask (haven't tried it yet) and if it works we'll buy them for everyone
• I got my scanner to work
• All photo printers are a waste of money
• I'm buying that house
• We found a good compromise on the vehicle maintenance policy
• O-rings for my fancy keyboard were worth it
• You're supposed to bring raw meat to a Mexican Potluck, apparently
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 4:17 PM on December 10, 2018 [7 favorites]


Sasha ended up being a Sasha after all that, but I loved reading your suggestions, and if he were only mine to name he would have ended up Sebastien or perhaps Hibou, both great suggestions. (And Bistyfrass was close to spot-on with the "shit, did he get bitten by a warble?" suggestion. It was not in fact a warble but that was definitely the vet's first thought as well, though on closer inspection she ruled it out.) He's doing great. He knocked down his first Christmas tree this week. He's the best decision I made all year.
posted by Stacey at 4:52 PM on December 10, 2018 [11 favorites]


I have a blog now on wordpress- and my pits are fabulously blue! thanks metafilter!
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 5:18 PM on December 10, 2018 [2 favorites]


From most recent to first AskMeFi question.

- a cinnamon roll is not a donut, and a MetaFilter moderator has only finite patience
- most MeFites are uninhibited and perverted nudists in front of their cats
- the song is annoying
- the sweater curse exists
- 238 pieces of cake does not last long
- a picture of a cake saying 'MetaFilter' exists online
- be more aware of your peers and friends
- suet is the great unknown
- there are films with very long airport runways
- Devils Tower is not visitable by public transport
- I should back up Flickr pictures, just to be sure
- the buttercup is interesting
- plenty of the web (1991-95) is archived in various, fragmented places (ex-colleagues helped with that)
- things gradually fade as you age
- it is okay to eat 45 bars of out-of-date Cadbury chocolate
- covering nipples and arse is the bare minimum in an English supermarket
- the cheese was eventually moved and ended up being melted down to feed homeless people; as an epilogue, and after I joked about this happening, Hollywood came calling so this may yet, just possibly, end up as a movie.
- you put the milk in the tea afterwards, never before
- I really should back up Flickr pictures, just to be sure
- librarians could wear period dress to mark an anniversary, though a time capsule would be easier
- if or when San Francisco slides into the sea, Twitter will still work (unfortunately)
- get the bus into Stockholm
- Sweden is nervous of attacks from the east
- there are websites for jobs in universities
- there are video games about university life
- use GNU to move files
- I found the Druids, and still hang out with them
- if you poo when going down a waterslide, then the poo will take on an independent trajectory, and Jessamyn will be unimpressed when Cortex and Matt riff on this during the next podcast
- only I remember the xkcd diagram
- there is civil unrest in many places
- I remain not good at first contact meetings
- the fucking noisy owl I still have nightmares about flew away
- dehydration is bad when you are trying to sleep
- airbnb is affordable in London
- America has been to war a lot
- video game players cover many demographics
- meditating in a flotation tank doesn't work well if you are still looking at your iPhone
- you can get a really good curry on Christmas Day in Birmingham
- Detroit options are limited in 6 hour layovers
- Gangham Style is popular
- never found the trilogy
- never found the cartoon, either

Thanks, MetaFilter
posted by Wordshore at 5:50 PM on December 10, 2018 [36 favorites]


I think it would be valuable if we got notice on the sidebar if one of our contacts followed-up on an AskMe (or marked it resolved) but I'm not sure how easy that would be to do since it's basically just an email to the mods.

A couple of my recent AskMes:

I bought the 15x21" sheet pan and some racks to fit it and spachcocked an 18 pound bird and it was perfect. I'm sold on spachcocking, especially now that i have the equipment for it.

We still don't know what The Thing is.
posted by bondcliff at 6:15 PM on December 10, 2018 [4 favorites]


I ate it.
posted by calgirl at 6:25 PM on December 10, 2018 [18 favorites]


Once upon a time I asked the Green for general experiences with Ikea kitchens. My brand new Ikea kitchen is set to be finished this week! I love it so much! I used several of the tips and tricks in that post (alas no amount of spreadsheets could have predicted that XPO would lose my entire order and it would take two months to get that sorted out.)
posted by soren_lorensen at 7:57 PM on December 10, 2018 [6 favorites]


Oh cool, we are doing this. Here are some updates to my recent-ish posts:

- I went to Kruger National Park, it was amazing, and I did a self-drive, staying a variety of the SANPark accommodations. Five days of that worked out about the same as a 3-day all-inclusive safari would have, and was much more chill. Despite being a woman travelling alone, I felt totally safe the whole time, except when an elephant charged my car. In case you're curious, the elephant on the left is what it looks like just before it decides to charge you.

-The answer to this one, at least in my case, is endless free drinks, food from business and first class, noise cancelling headphones instead of the stupid crappy ones you get in economy class, and the fancy pack of hand lotions and whatever that the first class passengers get. And that was on a flight when my sister wasn't even working - she just asked her colleagues to take care of me.

-Potchefstroom is beautiful, very safe compared to the rest of South Africa, and a fun little university town. I ended up just visiting for a while, but I had a blast and am pretty sorry I never did take the job I was offered there. Commuting to Johannesberg is probably not do-able though.

-I've been giving updates to my most recent anonymous question in the Fucking Fuck threads lately. Because, fucking fuck.
posted by lollusc at 8:32 PM on December 10, 2018 [6 favorites]


somebody once asked a question that revealed all the symptoms of appendicitis, and everybody said go, go, go to the doctor, get out of here

and we never found out what happened


THAT ONE STILL HAUNTS ME. UNIVERSITYNOMAD HASN'T BEEN SEEN ON METAFILTER SINCE.
posted by elsietheeel at 8:43 PM on December 10, 2018 [12 favorites]


You know, I'm gonna be That Guy (why is it always a guy? I honestly try to be sub-terrible, and yet here I am always being terrible) and suggest that probably we don't know the outcome because the outcome was bad.

...and, worse, I suggest the outcome was bad because healthcare is a giant fucking morass that depends on bad outcomes being either Your FAULT Bad Victim or else Just The Way It Goes.

So ... gonna go weep for people I've never met.
posted by aramaic at 12:22 AM on December 11, 2018 [5 favorites]


Wow yeah. I just looked at her posting history and she posted every couple of days for a couple of years leading up to that "should I go to the ER" post. Then nothing at all ever since. Shit.
posted by lollusc at 2:31 AM on December 11, 2018 [10 favorites]


That appendicitis ask is one of the few times I’ve ever been tempted to ask the site mods to break billing confidentiality and check whether or not the poster is still alive. Moderators, would that kind of thing be possible? Even if you don’t share her name or other personal information with the site? I hope this isnt a threadjack, but since it’s already been brought up...
posted by moonlight on vermont at 3:33 AM on December 11, 2018 [8 favorites]


My cousin is an asshole but didn't come to the funeral; I'm Skyping with a lot of kids in different places and am hoping a girl scout troop or local school calls me back soon!
posted by ChuraChura at 3:44 AM on December 11, 2018 [3 favorites]


I ate it. I died.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 4:01 AM on December 11, 2018 [13 favorites]


Thank you everyone who also cares about this! In lieu of a sidebar with "Best of Final Updates" or "Popular Unresolved," this thread - and others to come like it - is the best we can do, I think.
posted by Glomar response at 4:30 AM on December 11, 2018 [1 favorite]


I have posted a couple of updates recently. I suggest you go read the Groundhog Day gig thread because it is awesome. My blood donation mishap thread is pretty good too and includes a resolution.

But recently I asked about facing fears and then I faced mine. I had my apartment professionally cleaned and decluttered, just two days ago. I have a lot of trouble letting people into my space, for reasons, and it was terrifying and I am still getting through the aftermath. Things I didn't want them to take away are gone, some things I actually need, and I am trying to be assertive about it but I don't know exactly what to do because the stuff is GONE. Trying to let go, but it isn't easy. So yeah.
posted by wellred at 5:11 AM on December 11, 2018 [20 favorites]


wellred, your Facing Fears question was really meaningful to me
posted by rebent at 5:41 AM on December 11, 2018 [3 favorites]


I managed to only use AskMe twice this year. It didn't work out with my crush, but we're still online friends, which is good because she really is awesome. I remain single and I'm not unhappy about it.

Part of my jaw, tongue, and throat are still numb, but reassured I'm not going to suddenly stop breathing, I'm okay with muddling through. I burn my tongue a lot drinking tea, but I stopped burning my throat once I realized what was happening. So thanks for that.
posted by 80 Cats in a Dog Suit at 6:25 AM on December 11, 2018 [2 favorites]


About that appendicitis thread: that poster survived, according to our best evidence.

They're not required to post a followup, and I'm not getting into more detail. But enough people have worried and asked about this over the years, that I feel like it's unkind and even a little deceptive to let people continue to think they died.
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 7:58 AM on December 11, 2018 [97 favorites]


I appreciate that, LobsterMitten. I wouldn't have wanted to invade their privacy, and it's certainly up to them not to want to come back to the community, but I am glad to know that much.
posted by Countess Elena at 8:02 AM on December 11, 2018 [12 favorites]


Like elsietheeel I periodically check said poster's history waiting to see something new. Thanks LobsterMitten for the followup.
posted by nobeagle at 8:03 AM on December 11, 2018 [5 favorites]


None of mine are terribly exciting.

However - my niece is in college! We all survived high school and she graduated. She may or may not stay in college, but she seems to be figuring out her life, or exploring her life, in any case. Our relationship is far better without us living together, and I am a far better aunt than pseudo-parent. (No surprise there, but we were her best options.) She actually called us last night with a tire/car issue, and we were able to help to some degree.

One of mine with the most comments was when my niece missed a birthday, and I had an out of proportion reaction to it due to a medication change - thankfully, I came here to vent rather than going to her, and you all made me realize that something was out of whack, and I was able to fix the medication change.

My other question with a high number of comments was the recent front load washer tricks question, and my problems have been mostly solved with all your tips - the washer and I are coming to terms. Thankfully, because I was about to get a different one!
posted by needlegrrl at 9:46 AM on December 11, 2018 [10 favorites]


Outing myself, this anon question is mine. The follow-up is this comment. TL;DR, nothing changed so I left.

Rereading that now, Jesus chimney I have come a long way in a short time, and you all are very smart and loving people.
posted by Fig at 11:17 AM on December 11, 2018 [17 favorites]


All the Meatafilter-suggested cookbooks that I recently ordered based on this Ask just arrived this week and I am excited to go on a cooking spree this month so I can 'mark best answers' in that thread.
posted by twoplussix at 12:46 PM on December 11, 2018 [2 favorites]


Oh, I have an anon ask I can own up to! It was this one, from when I was 22: being professional while socially awkward. Many of the comments mentioned that your professional contacts--volunteers and donors, in my case--don't really care whether you're awkward as long as you're getting them what they need, which was a message that 22-year-old me really needed to hear. I definitely swiped KogeLiz's tactic of being gently self-deprecating when I get tongue-tied.

I still don't have the world's best social skills, but I switched to a job with no volunteer management and then ironically started doing it again completely by choice with an org I volunteer with. It turns out people management is a puzzle to solve and my brain loves those. I also do more client-facing work now and while it does deplete my energy reserves a lot faster than other parts of my job, it can be really rewarding.

Also, a lot of people assumed that when I said I'm socially awkward I meant that I'm shy, which makes sense in the context of my ask but is hilarious if you've ever met me.
posted by capricorn at 1:40 PM on December 11, 2018 [1 favorite]


Other "final answers" that are too boring to be worth commenting on the ask itself: I never got the screws out, I asked for doubanjiang but I actually wanted shacha sauce (and the Japanese market near my building sells it), Killer ESP rules but I live in DC now, this building got demolished which was the saddest, I still use To Do every day, I sleep on my back now thanks to my PT, I switched Gmail from IMAP to POP and no longer have my @cox.net address, the Kicked Up Short Rib was only a temporary menu item (rude!), tiny drawstring bags are great for holding loose band-aids/Lactaid packets/hair ties in your purse, I'm back to unadulterated oatmeal, Oshkosh and Boston and Santa Ana were excellent, I never got around to donating the costume or hanging stuff on my wall, I moved out of this apartment and also got a ladder bookcase, Wunderground never answered my question--but they removed the "range" datum, I didn't watch anything else on YouTube Red, and I bought some delicious Don Ciccio amari but Averna's still my #1.
posted by capricorn at 1:40 PM on December 11, 2018 [1 favorite]


I was thinking about posting another update to my ha-ha-not-panicking-but-hahahaha-panicking question about emergency brain surgery, and I was curious about whether updates are a thing, although I was also thinking about asking a related question as a follow up, because now I'm several months out from the surgery and still have some questions.

As it turns out, I fortunately haven't lost my sense of taste, although it has changed, and I have no direct sense of smell, but I still have some of my olfactory nerve, so I have some sensory weirdness that AskMe might have some ideas on how to manage - in addition to the kindness expressed in the answers to my question, I very much appreciate the comment from FencingGal about how something like this might happen, because it helped me figure out and communicate with medical providers about what might be happening when the difficult-to-describe sensory weirdness really kicked into gear after my unfortunate attempt to use the emu oil someone gave me for my scar. With regard to the weird world of phantom smells, I seriously advise against being haunted by an emu.
posted by Little Dawn at 1:49 PM on December 11, 2018 [4 favorites]


Elly Vortex: "And to show good faith: this was an anonymous ask from me. Mefites helped me to see that there wasn't a perfect solution to my problem but I had to work through it.
I kept the dog and keeping her was the best decision of my life.
"

I mean, thanks for sharing, but this is scarcely an update: it's clear from the original question that you intended to keep the dog. The question was whether you would include your ex-boyfriend in your dog's life or not. Did you?
posted by crazy with stars at 2:29 PM on December 11, 2018 [2 favorites]


There was this asker who wondered how to get rid of cling wrap around broccoli and the likes, which their knife (for undisclosed reasons) wouldn't cut and when the collective got into "are you doing it right," "cut from the inside out" and "what's the problem really," or started giving (ahum) some knife sharpening tips, they just left us all behind wondering. I guess, a sudden change of diet...

so, no follow up, sadly
posted by Namlit at 2:42 PM on December 11, 2018


I did end up making the sign of the cross in the play. I'm sure nobody else noticed or cared, but it felt right to me.

I never looked for a copy of the book; it was enough to know that it actually existed and I wasn't misremembering.

Reader, we won the costume contest
posted by The Underpants Monster at 3:39 PM on December 11, 2018 [1 favorite]


It was an anonymous question regarding the 2016 election, but... well...

*gestures demonstrably towards the current US political landscape* ( ಠ ʖ̯ಠ)ノ
posted by Arson Lupine at 4:42 PM on December 11, 2018 [1 favorite]


About that appendicitis thread: that poster survived, according to our best evidence.

I was just thinking about them the other day. Thank you for this update!
posted by jgirl at 5:06 PM on December 11, 2018


Last year I asked about where to live in Sydney. We ended up living in Randwick for a year but we have bought a house in Erskineville and move in this weekend :).

Everyone's advice was great and I appreciate the person who took the time to memail me with detailed advice as well. I must attend a meetup at some point.
posted by poxandplague at 6:33 PM on December 11, 2018 [2 favorites]


just imagine the most hilarrible anon askme you ever saw. picture it in your head. feel the same confused, horrified, guiltily entertained emotions you felt upon seeing it for the very first time and saying "what the actual fuck is this ungodly ridiculous nightmare told by a human disaster"

that was mine, those were all mine, and no one can ever prove otherwise
posted by poffin boffin at 7:37 PM on December 11, 2018 [9 favorites]


The question was whether you would include your ex-boyfriend in your dog's life or not. Did you?

My dog wound up cutting ties when I did. In the end it needed to happen so that I could move forward. It sucked and I felt guilty for years (and oh theres that pang of guilt again) but it was a world I needed to leave. As far as I know, Jed is fine and Chicken continues to be her happy, doofy self.
posted by Elly Vortex at 7:58 PM on December 11, 2018 [7 favorites]


Many of my AskMes were "why is Child doing Annoying Thing?" And as many of you gently pointed out, children all do annoying things but eventually outgrow them.

Then they find new ones.

But anyway, he's 13, 5'7", and a ball of conflicted teenage emotion wrapped in hilarious oddness and most of my job continues to be letting him be himself. He's going to anyway
posted by emjaybee at 8:40 PM on December 11, 2018 [4 favorites]


I've always wondered what happened to xer0taco and u.n.owen.
posted by bendy at 9:43 PM on December 11, 2018 [2 favorites]


This anon is me: a methy situation.

Things got worse. It basically turned into a real-life horror movie, with my landlord, who had previously been a friendly guy I really liked, going full Mr. Hyde. I stayed in the apartment, a charming guest house near my office, and tried to avoid him as much as possible. (No longer do I roll my eyes at the new homeowners in movies who don't vacate their haunted houses at the first sign that something's amiss.) There were sex parties, there were creepy strangers, strange late night encounters, etc. One night I was on my couch, reading, when I looked up and he was watching me through a window. Then, about nine months after I posted my question, my landlord overdosed in a truly tragic way – he ended up as a John Doe in the LA County Coroner system, and his surviving partner, also a user, basically fell apart and lost his mind. I wish there had been some way to intervene, but of course, that was not in the cards. I should have listened to the AskMe advice to immediately move out.
posted by roger ackroyd at 7:13 AM on December 12, 2018 [7 favorites]


I got my PhD and so did the other guy and the world didn't end for either of us; I decided to stay in academia and feel all right about it; this is probably related to the fact that I finally figured out how to sometimes write in a sustained way rather than over weekend binges. I feel like I haven't had a chance to really thank the people who answered those questions of mine, who have made a real difference to my ability to maintain some semblance of mental health while trying to be an academic. I am especially grateful the enormous kindness of the commenters here who got me through my PhD viva without collapsing into an abject mess. (The thesis wasn't so bad, it turns out, and is a book now.)
posted by Aravis76 at 8:59 AM on December 12, 2018 [2 favorites]


The tres leches cake recipe suggested by If only I had a penguin... is YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY!!!!

Actually I felt like an idiot after posting this question about what to make with PB2, not realizing that it's actually a pretty common product and there are lots of recipes for it everywhere. (I discovered it on an obscure dieting web site and thought I'd found the Yukon.) But the suggestions were good, so thank you!
posted by Melismata at 9:10 AM on December 12, 2018 [1 favorite]


Is there a way to look up anonymous questions you submitted?
posted by OnTheLastCastle at 9:31 AM on December 12, 2018 [1 favorite]


Nope, sorry. Three methods to re-find an anon question:

- By tags, if you remember what tags you would have used. To see questions asked by the anonymous account, that are tagged with a certain keyword, replace 'games' in this URL: https://ask.metafilter.com/tags/games/17564

- By keyword. Search for distinctive keywords that would have been in the question - you can search just anonymous questions, by searching in the lower search box (labeled "search activity") on Anonymous's profile page

- By date. Browse thru the general AskMe archive chronologically if you remember when it would have been -- archive links are also at the bottom of every page. You can also go thru the list of all questions asked by the Anonymous account, starting from that account's profile page.
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 10:06 AM on December 12, 2018 [5 favorites]


This question and this question are still unresolved and driving me insane. I never figured out the pickled okra thing either but I've mostly come to terms with that. Those other two questions will haunt me into the grave and beyond.
posted by prize bull octorok at 10:40 AM on December 12, 2018 [1 favorite]


I named my new kitty!

Then I dumped that little mother fucker.

Then I ate her.

I’m on my way to the doctor now.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 11:41 AM on December 12, 2018 [6 favorites]


I'm not linking to the anonymous question I'm referencing, but you were all wrong.
posted by Thella at 1:14 PM on December 12, 2018 [5 favorites]




Then I dumped that little mother fucker.

Then I ate her.


Aren't you a little out of sequence there?
posted by jamjam at 3:53 PM on December 12, 2018 [4 favorites]


I got the rooftop tent, have slept in it many times, and my car has retained its natural shape!

I never did anything for the weird vibration in my arm. It went away in its own.
posted by CoffeeHikeNapWine at 4:28 PM on December 12, 2018 [3 favorites]


still dating my girlfriend, she's awesome, i'm so happy! it's a poly relationship situation which, along with being gay, is also totally new to me so i'm sure i'll have questions related to those feels someday.

plans for a tattoo of something in my mom's handwriting once i get the $$

i'm now an adjunct math professor at an engineering college and have like healthcare and a retirement fund with matching??? it feels kind of surreal honestly

i haven't really kept up with swimming because i was using the pool at my old school where i was a grad student, and my new job doesn't have one on-campus.
posted by augustimagination at 4:35 PM on December 12, 2018 [2 favorites]


I'm sure no one cares about my boring questions, but reviewing the follow ups has been depressing:

I gave up/am on hold at the moment for seeking my master's degree

I gave up on seeking a warm vacation and no longer need to worry about it being Zika free

I ended up buying a new Prius

I gave on my online journaling idea after failing to figure out how the proposed answers could meet my requirements

I still work in a building that regularly conducts reckless and unsafe fire drills
posted by seesom at 4:38 PM on December 12, 2018 [1 favorite]


-I never ended up volunteering for RAINN (because they had too many volunteers!) but did finally start last year as a volunteer counselor for Crisis Text Line, and really enjoy it.

-We did the Lebanese food, good call

-The mystery bug bites stayed a mystery

-I went to Venice alone and had honestly just the best time

-I didn’t even try again with Kaiser, but found a sliding scale clinic and am coming up on a year in therapy

-I sucked it up and moved upstairs to a pet-friendly unit, which is just okay but led to...

-The cat’s name is Zoe, and at the moment she would very much like me to stop tapping on my glowing rectangle and play with her.

Thanks, Mefites!
posted by jameaterblues at 4:58 PM on December 12, 2018 [3 favorites]


The new job that "wasn't working out" is coming up on 7 years in January. I transferred to a different department after a year and a half and got promoted to supervisor last March.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 6:01 PM on December 12, 2018 [4 favorites]


Ok, I am new to AskMe, I don't see how to update an Ask? Anyway, my update is:

-I had to escalate to the superintendent and school board, racist teacher is on leave, my son gets to stay in the class, everyone gets diversity training, and I am included in the diversity training panel. it's still an on-going situation, but I'm glad we stayed out of the media and I advocated for my son.
posted by alathia at 6:43 PM on December 12, 2018 [22 favorites]


I feel like a third to half of the time, I end up doing nothing. Like, I don't buy the thing, or go to the doctor, or have the meeting, or whatever. I go in feeling as though the subject of the Ask is super important (or at least worth spending an Ask on, anyway) but then somewhere along the line it just… stops feeling like it matters, and I end up just forgetting about the whole thing—regardless of how good the advice I got was. My followthrough isn't great, I guess.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 6:52 PM on December 12, 2018 [7 favorites]


I don't see how to update an Ask?

You can just add a comment to it, same as you did here; it'll automatically get highlighted. People would be glad to see it.
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 7:48 PM on December 12, 2018


Though note that they close after a year; in that case, you can drop the mods a line at the contact form with a final update we can add after the fact for you.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:55 PM on December 12, 2018


- the water pitcher *still* hasn't been cleaned, as far as i know, but no one has died (...as far as i know...)

- i did not cook the pot roast long enough and it was kinda tough, but i turned the leftovers into stew and it was pretty good

- roasted celeriac root is fucking delicious as a fancy-ass vegan entree -- i'm trying to convince the cashier at my local grocery store to try celeriac root even though they look like terrifying alien mandrake babies when raw (twice now she has been like 'omg so someone actually eats these?' and i am like HELL YES)

- no one ever figured out what was happening with the lymph node -- like, the surgeon literally just shrugged when i asked -- but it was Not Cancer so that is good enough for me

- no one ever figured out how or why my health insurance got cancelled but HR was able to un-cancel it (though not able to explain how it got cancelled in the first place?) and they did end up covering the ridiculous amount of money it cost to find out there was nothing cancerous in my lymph node

- The Battle of Polytopia is absurdly compelling and it is the only mobile game i have ever spent money on and i don't even regret the money spent. worth it.

- i'm still too insecure to wear that hat in public
posted by halation at 10:59 PM on December 12, 2018 [2 favorites]


I quit my job, ditched my flat, put everything I own into storage and am nearly two months in to a cross-Europe career-break holiday, which was going great until I contracted a bastard of a cold and have spent the past few days lying in bed looking frustratedly out at various glorious Italian cities in the winter sunshine.

Still no idea what I want to do with my life when this is all over, but for now this will do.
posted by aihal at 11:52 PM on December 12, 2018 [4 favorites]


I never found out the identity of the TV show that freaked me out as a kid.

I wrote a book about a magical plot to steal fragments of old London that are visible today. It was published earlier this year.

I combined my mom's childhood memories with information Arco found in the Holocaust Museum archives to write a picture book about being a Jewish child in Nazi Austria. It's a heavy topic for a picture book but I was inspired by a bunch of wonderfully ambitious picture books. It's currently out on submission to publishers.

I worked hard to be a well-informed UK voter but I'm not convinced the rest of the country is trying as hard as I am.
posted by yankeefog at 5:46 AM on December 13, 2018 [6 favorites]


I never found out the identity of the TV show that freaked me out as a kid.

If it's the same opening scene I'm remembering, he then opens the door and falls through and ends up a cartoon in a magical world and the rest of the show was animated... but I can't remember the show itself.
posted by elsietheeel at 6:46 AM on December 13, 2018


Interesting! Let me know if you remember it.
posted by yankeefog at 8:04 AM on December 13, 2018


I don't know that this is what yankeefog was looking for and I'm not convinced it's what you're remembering either, elsietheeel, but your description made me think of and finally track down Kidd Video, a cartoon series where a teenage band gets sucked inside a cartoon world through a glowing mirror and then has animated adventures and also writes songs etc.

Which is a show I have inextricably tied together with The Police's "Every Breath You Take", a show I have been convinced all my life is the first place I heard that song, despite per the above opening theme sequence definitely not being that song at all (but bearing some structural similarities). And according to some Yahoo! Answers person that's because they used it in the original broadcasts but not after, for presumably "oh shit we didn't get a durable license for this" reasons. Which suggests I saw it when it originally aired, and that song just burrowed right into my brain.

But also that's the only cite for that I've found. What if it was always just a sound-alike and that person made the same mistake, or is just straight bullshitting? But probably not. But what if! But basically the only way to resolve this is for someone to have kept and later digitized a VHS dub of the original airings? Sometimes I feel like the internet is just straight-up gaslighting me about 80s ephemera.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:21 AM on December 13, 2018 [2 favorites]


I organized my library generally by subject, but alphabetized fiction and poetry. I've since moved to a another apartment in the same complex because the ceiling was collapsing in the the old one and the books are a mess again and still not all out of their boxes. (There were 40 when we moved this time.)

We visited the Frost Place and I posted a picture there in the thread, which I can't see from my work computer, but maybe you can.

I still love this question and the answers, even though I don't have an update per se.

I've watched "Killing Them Softly" several times.

I now pretend that the Hobbit movies don't exist.

The radio short story broadcast I was looking for in this question is now available on Youtube!

I've been to a Music in Deerfield concert, though it was years ago, so the one I went to was in Deerfield.

I bought a Vampire Weekend album.

I ate at Singa's Pizza for years until the location that delivered to my apartment closed.

There's an anon question I won't link to, but, reader, I married her.
posted by Jahaza at 2:57 PM on December 13, 2018 [3 favorites]


I do wish questions stayed open longer. It often takes me ages to get something done (thanks, chronic fatigue!) and I always feel a sense of incompletion if I can't wind up the post with an account of how the matter got resolved. Although I'm sure no one else cares how they worked out -- most of mine are minor, practical matters. But here's for some updates anyway:

I wanted to dye a silk scarf. It ended up working out well.

I wanted to fix a clock. I fixed it, and now whenever a clock of mine stops working, I know I can just replace the mechanism myself rather than either replacing the entire clock, or paying to have it repaired.

I wanted to make a peridot chip necklace. I'm still working on that one, but I've made progress. I have made a sketch of its construction, have a good idea of how I will deal with all the technical bits, have bought some of the components, and have a list of those I still need.

I wanted to know how to repair and paint my bathroom vanity cabinet interior and the wall by my front door. I repaired the vanity cabinet ages ago, and rearranged the stuff in the cabinet so that everything that gets wet will sit on the glass shelves, not on the metal lowest shelf. I was able to make it look nearly as good as new and it's stayed that way. I only fixed the entryway wall last week. It looks good, but fingers crossed that it stays that way. There may be moisture issues, but I've had both the roof and the outside wall looked at and they seem to be fine so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

I wanted to find replacement bedknobs. In the end my woodworker father made me some. Incidentally, I bought my dad a 3M P100 particulate filter respirator to wear while he's woodworking.

Fixing my camera wasn't viable and I simply replaced it.

I wanted a teal parka for under $200. I bought a Mountain Warehouse Isla in teal (which they no longer seem to offer) for $120 or so.

I wanted teddy bear buttons for the teddy bear dress, jacket and purse set I was making for my grandniece. I found the perfect ones on Etsy.

I wanted to replace the clip on the side of my rain barrel that held the hose in place. I spent a lot of time on this one, scouring the internet and every local hardware/home building supply shop within walking distance of me, but no store had a suitable clip in stock. In the end the solution was crazy simple: I took a strip of black velcro from my sewing supply stash, screwed it to the side of the barrel, and used it to hold the hose. Took five minutes and I had everything I needed on hand and it's been working perfectly well for years.

I ended up electing not to switch to a GI diet or to write the knitting project planning book. I never did learn to hit people, though if it ever becomes possible for me to take Krav Maga, I will.

I have yet to cat-proof my freezer.

On a darker note, in January/March of 2014, I posted several questions about a former tenant of mine who screwed me over by abandoning the basement apartment of my house leaving it in horrible condition and owing me five months' rent plus damages plus a cleaning/repair fee plus lost rental income because it needed so much work before I could rent it out again. If I could have sued him, I would have made a case for $8,000 though it was really more like $10,000. But I couldn't find him. In July 2017, he resurfaced, sending me an email in which he apologized for everything and saying that after spending over a year homeless, he was 1.5 years sober and in school and would repay me $100/month or more until he'd paid everything he owed me. He gave me that first $100. I even posted this question on his behalf after we discussed his interest in getting into voice over work... and then he disappeared a second time. He doesn't answer his emails, and the phone number he gave me stopped working. I suppose he's gone back to using and is homeless again. And that I'll never get the money he owes me and that I quite desperately need. It's tragic for him and a considerable hardship for me.

This was about my favourite brother. I never did pass along the counselling information to him. He died in November 2011 of a massive heart attack at the age of 42.

ETA: I didn't realize it was possible to ask the mods to update an old AskMe. I'll have to do that for some of mine. I've asked 216 questions so this isn't all my unresolved ones by any means.
posted by orange swan at 3:47 PM on December 13, 2018 [3 favorites]


Mine aren’t that exciting, but:

-We moved to Minneapolis in October 2013, and I LOVE IT. Best decision I ever made, yo.
-I chose nursing school, and I graduate from the ADN program in one week (and continue on the BSN in January). Thanks, y’all!
posted by timetoevolve at 5:30 PM on December 13, 2018 [5 favorites]


Cortex, that is definitely not what I was thinking of, but I love the chain reaction: my vague childhood memory sparked elsiethel's memory which sparked yours, and I may be thinking of elsietheel's show, and elsietheel may be thinking of yours, but you and I are thinking of something different, and none of us are 100% sure that we remember what we think we do.
posted by yankeefog at 2:16 AM on December 14, 2018 [3 favorites]




I smeared Burt's Bees tinted lipbalm (bonus tingling sensation) on my vulva to make those prints. They make great commemorative gifts.
posted by sugarbomb at 11:32 AM on December 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


You can also go thru the list of all questions asked by the Anonymous account
Anonymous ... has an account?! Whoa. (We are all Anonymous, etc.)

I just looked through my own non-Anonymous questions and am laughing at myself.

I am still looking for a favorite winter cocktail and had totally forgotten I ever asked you all for help, but lately I've been enjoying Old Fashioneds, which many of you recommended. I'll listen better next time.

I rocked that century.

I took the puppy on vacation, and it was a delight.

I wrapped up my clothes in plastic bags and didn't open it at my mom's, and so the only thing that smelled like cigarette smoke was my coat.

I ate the pears and made a pumpkin pie instead.

My kids are not scared of the basement!

I finally figured out how not to overheat on long bike rides: skip the plain water and drink only water with an eletrolyte tab, and bring extra tabs for when I re-fill my bottle.

And the best of all: I got the funded sabbatical. It was fantastic.
posted by bluedaisy at 2:55 PM on December 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


I now pretend that the Hobbit movies don't exist.

So do all who live to see such times.
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 4:48 PM on December 14, 2018 [6 favorites]


I never got around to buying an iPhone case but my job there is ending the first week of January so it’s moot.

I bought the suggested desk. It’s mostly perfect.

Greg_Ace loaned me the gadget I needed to digitize cassettes. I’ve done several already but the project has stalled as mine generally do.

Another unfinished project to make an online biography site. I started building a site with Gatsby and graphQL.

My mom and I went to Gioridano’s in Chicago. Twas delicious.

I invested in a cannabis mutual fund through Stash. I’ve been investing $50 every two weeks. I rarely check on it but the price has been all over the place. At one point I checked and it was up 21%. More recently it’s been down a tiny bit.

Amazon iOT dash button. Yet another project in progress.
posted by bendy at 6:37 PM on December 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


I've asked 88 questions. I try to post a follow-up in-thread if there's actually a resolution of some kind but I often forget or there isn't really a tidy "and here's what worked." Sometimes whatever I mark as "best answer" is my resolution.

* Never found stylish women who look very much like me
* Fatigue got better when the weather cooled off, and I've also noticed that social stress is a contributing factor
* Threw out the chicken and (crying inside) went and bought more. That dinner party was a smash hit that created new friendships and that people are still talking about.
* Sampled a martial arts class but haven't signed up yet.
* Wound up using the packed entertainment and in-flight treats less than I would have expected, and was less anxious during the trip than I expected (probably thanks to klonopin)
* Threw out the pork (crying inside)
* Sucked it up and had the second sleep study
* Bought a few hostess gifts but didn't use them much. I still have a jar of lemon curd sitting in my cabinet.
* Based on recommendations I got a lightweight, very warm jacket that can be layered under other jackets/coats. It's excellent.
* Still watching "Friends" at bedtime
* Still buying my lunches
* Didn't cancel wifi
* Express pants are still the only pants
* Quit Tindr. Haven't been on any dates at all in months; haven't kissed anyone in years.

That's not all of them but it's over a year's worth.
posted by bunderful at 7:27 AM on December 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Well the kitty with the mystery ailments died last week, so I ain't give a flying fuck about Christmas anymore anyway.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 10:20 AM on December 17, 2018


I'm so sorry about your kitty. <3
posted by elsietheeel at 5:00 PM on December 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


I'm so sorry to hear your sad news, WpofiBH. It's bad at any time, but I'm sure it hurts a little harder this time of year when everything and everyone around us has been dipped in a cheerful coating. We're thinking of you.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 7:53 AM on December 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


I’m so sorry :(
posted by bunderful at 8:45 AM on December 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Someone memailed us the relevant international plumbing code, which was pending at the time, and we used it to get our bucket toilet approved in a major US city. We can legit shit in a bucket.
posted by aniola at 2:05 PM on December 19, 2018 [3 favorites]


Orange Swan, I'm sorry I missed this on my first read-through of the thread, but I wanted to say: I'm so sorry for the loss of your brother.
posted by yankeefog at 9:15 AM on December 20, 2018 [1 favorite]


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