Metafilter Fundraising Month! September 1, 2020 12:24 PM   Subscribe

Hello everyone! We usually do a fundraising drive around the site's birthday, but this year has been a weird one, so we're doing it in September instead.

We're actually up year-over-year on subscriptions from 2019. This is fantastic! However, AdSense has continued to fall off, and is only about 60% of what it was last year. This is less fantastic, although it was not surprising. So we'd like to encourage everyone to support the site, and we've come up with some fun things to do to make that easy, fun, and accessible for as wide a range of budgets as possible.

The first thing is a series of Chatfilter threads. Look, everyone loves chatfilter. There's nothing better than a shocking, detailed, intimate debate about each other's personal habits, wrong opinions, favorite trivia, or what have you. So we're going to be running a special feature starting every weekend in September, where we'll post one chatfilter thread to the blue and let everyone at it. What thread, you ask? Well, there's the fun(draising) part! Donate a dollar to the site, send us a message with your proposed topic, and we'll count it as a vote. Donate ten dollars, ten votes! Every Friday, we'll tally up the votes and post the winning thread on Saturday. Post your topic suggestions here, rally support, trade votes, and have some fun with it!

Secondly, we're going to do a Theme Week - Dreams! Posts, questions, projects, songs, media - tag them all with #dreamweek and let's talk about dreams. Thyme's running this one, and they'll have a post up on Monday, September 8th to kick it off.

Third, Jessamyn's organizing a Sponsor-A-Post drive! Ever wanted to see a post about something but didn't want to be the one to make it? Chip in $20 (same as in town) and Jessamyn will make it happen! See the post about it here.

Fourth, we want to encourage subscriptions, too! So we’re doing the Extreme Pandemic Haircut Challenge: for every $50 in new subscriptions we get this month, cortex will cut off an inch of his foot-plus of hair. Yes, up to and including going completely bald! Keep an eye on the MetaFilter Hair-O-Meter; we’ll track progress over the course of the month. (Or less, if that’s how it goes. Sorry cortex. It’ll grow back.)

And, lastly, I just wanted to thank everyone for being here. It's a hard, weird, shitty year, and this is absolutely not how I expected to spend it. Nobody, I think, is spending their year how they expected to. But honestly, it has felt really good to come back, shoulder some of the load that my teammates have been carrying so long, and feel like we're really starting to make progress on stuff. A lot of that is invisible to y'all - things like reworked schedules, back-end process changes, long-delayed minor tool fixes - but is making a really big and healthy difference in the lives of the team. And a lot of it *is* visible, and we hope that it will continue to be visible, and that it'll make everyone's time here better and healthier. Thank you all.
posted by restless_nomad (staff) to MetaFilter Gatherings at 12:24 PM (53 comments total) 18 users marked this as a favorite

And just to reiterate, because that was long: this is the main thread for the Chatfilter event. What formless, goofy, fun threads do you want to see on the blue? Come up with ideas, campaign, swap votes, and chat about it here!
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 12:26 PM on September 1

What is a subscription? Like a monthly donation?
posted by oulipian at 12:43 PM on September 1

Yup! Any recurring contribution made from the funding page.
posted by cortex (staff) at 12:44 PM on September 1

y no merch?

u haz merch?

i buy merch!

others buy merch!
posted by lalochezia at 1:21 PM on September 1 [7 favorites]

There's merch! (bottom of the page)

No *new* merch, though, not this round.
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 1:25 PM on September 1 [2 favorites]

I am currently chatting with friends about our breakfast cereal memories and family rules/traditions thereof, and am learning things I never knew about breakfast cereal! Would anyone else feel like chatfiltering about that?

(I mean, it's no sitting-vs-standing-to-wipe, but on the other hand, it's much more appetizing...)
posted by theatro at 1:54 PM on September 1 [6 favorites]

Socks socks socks
posted by Going To Maine at 2:05 PM on September 1 [1 favorite]

Everyone's always asking how much wood a woodchuck could counterfactually chuck, but no one ever answers. I would like answers. I would like arguments and diagrams.
posted by cortex (staff) at 2:09 PM on September 1 [2 favorites]

...I mean, this Major Brands Of Breakfast Cereal Ranked listicle I am currently reading, I could argue for days about this. Plus I learned that some people actually did personally consume the giant single blocks of compacted shredded wheat. As food.
posted by theatro at 2:11 PM on September 1 [2 favorites]

I feel like the big debate is going to be Milk First/Cereal First. Then you get into which milk is worth drinking afterwards, do you pick a cereal specifically for the aftermilk, and we can talk about those monsters that don't even use milk.
posted by curious nu at 2:45 PM on September 1 [3 favorites]

Is cereal a soup? Is pizza a sandwich? Is gazpacho a smoothie?
posted by zeptoweasel at 2:55 PM on September 1 [3 favorites]

Nowadays we can't just choose our cereals, we even get to choose our milk(-like substance). There's cow, oat, soy, almond... so many new options. Just sayin'.
posted by Too-Ticky at 3:26 PM on September 1

Plus I learned that some people actually did personally consume the giant single blocks of compacted shredded wheat. As food.

Tell my mom I said hi next time you see her!

(I assume she is the only human who did so. I think my sister and I tried a few times, but the Bland was just too strong.)
posted by kalimac at 4:26 PM on September 1


Can we get this added to the forbidden word list?
posted by paper chromatographologist at 4:54 PM on September 1 [23 favorites]

Will people argue about aftermilk as vigorously as they did about afterpants?
posted by theatro at 5:05 PM on September 1 [2 favorites]

When I was a young child and left alone with the cheerios, milk, and Tupperware sugar boat (you know the one), I'd fill the bowl with Cheerios, then pour sugar on dry until I could see it piling up inside the loosely fill cereal, then add milk. Each spoonful would be like this slurry of sugar and milk with some cereal in it. And there was always slurry left over to drink, too. Doing it that way meant my mom couldn't see just how much sugar I was adding as long as I had a few seconds while she was not paying attention.
posted by seanmpuckett at 5:34 PM on September 1 [11 favorites]

I know this idea's been floated before, but what would it take to create some new merchs? I know there a ton of creative people around here, we could maybe do some sort of contest? In a few different categories? Like Eurovision only with less vikings? Or with vikings, that works too.
posted by signal at 5:54 PM on September 1 [1 favorite]

You people are CHEATING. You are not allowed to chat about cereal in this thread. You have to pay to vote for a thread where you are allowed to do that. You are stealing money from babies!
posted by rikschell at 6:34 PM on September 1 [28 favorites]

Babies can't even eat cereal, your argument makes no sense.
posted by curious nu at 7:33 PM on September 1 [1 favorite]

cortex: "Everyone's always asking how much wood a woodchuck could counterfactually chuck, but no one ever answers. I would like answers. I would like arguments and diagrams."

Everyone knows that a woodchuck could chuck a quarter of a cord of wood if he could get a quarter for every cord he chucked.
posted by namewithoutwords at 8:27 PM on September 1 [2 favorites]

Seems obvious but I'm going to ask anyway just in case, all these rates are in American dollars right?
posted by eisforcool at 9:41 PM on September 1 [1 favorite]

posted by cortex (staff) at 10:02 PM on September 1

I'm sure there's something in the woodchuck question that can be quantified. Even if it's the softest wood imaginable the woodchuck could only open/close it's mouth at a certain rate ane even that takes energy/calories Also the time is unspecified... are we talking about an immortal woodchuck? Does it have to sleep? Eat? Given the width and depth of a woodchuck's bite and the time that bite takes (depending on the hardness of the wood and the wear/growth on the poor woodchucks teeth) and the time in consideration... Should be answerable within a magnitude.
posted by zengargoyle at 11:31 PM on September 1

Everyone knows that a woodchuck could chuck a quarter of a cord of wood if he could get a quarter for every cord he chucked.

Lies! Everyone knows a woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood. I mean, jeez.
posted by Ghidorah at 11:33 PM on September 1 [4 favorites]

Woodchucks chuck wood and I'm pretty sure Edward Woodward would too.
posted by h00py at 3:57 AM on September 2

How exactly do I submit my monetary votes for a cereal chat filter thread?
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 5:47 AM on September 2 [1 favorite]

So! Go to the Fundraising page, make a contribution, then send us a message at the contact form with the amount and what you're voting for. (If you make a recurring contribution, it will count towards the Hair Cut Challenge as well, but for simplicity we'll only count September's contribution towards the Chatfilter voting.)

This is all pretty much honor system, we can check it if we need to but we'd rather not need to, and if you want to do something like pledge $10 now but save some of your votes for next week, just make it clear in your message.
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 6:38 AM on September 2 [2 favorites]

There's cow, oat, soy, almond [milk]

Given the way the latter 3 are made, I'm not convinced the first item in this list is actually related to the rest
posted by Nonsteroidal Anti-Inflammatory Drug at 6:46 AM on September 2 [3 favorites]

Pets or toddlers Being Naughty is my all-time favourite topic.
posted by stillnocturnal at 7:53 AM on September 2 [1 favorite]

Short science fiction stories. That’s what I want. I’m looking for escapist breaks from politics and fighting. We’ve had two posts with stories recently and I’ve really liked them. Neither post generated a lot of fun comments, though.

I read all the Metatalk threads and I am blown away by how careful and determined some of you are to make your points but I’m absolutely not here for the fighting and it’s starting to be bad for me. The best outcome here is that metafilter gets a little more fun, so I’m happy to see even the slightest interest in formless goofiness.
posted by Vatnesine at 8:10 AM on September 2 [6 favorites]

I’ve always secretly wished that we could do a yearly Purrformance review thread like this one from 2016. More cat content so I can talk more about my cats!
posted by janepanic at 8:17 AM on September 2 [9 favorites]

Can we talk about if toilet paper is dumb? Like, other options for wiping, peeing in places other than toilets, bidets and associated watertools for genitalia, modern outhouses, personal, portable TP alternatives folks use. I would like to chat about non-toilet paper post-urination and -defecation cleanliness management. Thank you for your time and consideration.
posted by youarenothere at 1:07 PM on September 2 [6 favorites]

I must be super burned out from staying home and NOT SEEING ANYONE BUT MY SPOUSE AND CHILD, and I struggle for creative ideas (see my "how do I play with my toddler re: Batman" post), but my very first thought for a post for Jessamyn to create was about Nadia Comeneci. Imma do it.
posted by Pax at 5:35 PM on September 2 [1 favorite]

for a donation to filter, I will write a rondeau about cats or Scot Tissue and Bolshevism.

took care of 9 cats for a year and a half. Each different, twice caught pride mother with a shoulder holstet and dice. I kept a box of the "HERE, human" stuff cats drag in by the 2 bull mastiffs. Night guard dogs. Jaws the size of round bread loaves. 373 lbs. of Joy. 2 other mixed dogs. a parrot, 7 chickens. and a ferret.
it was space, parrot third floor, ferret, second with little dogs accessing 2nd and half of first as little don't mix with mastiffs so big fellas had the front half: kitchen, dining room, kennel room, rompus room.
little guys got along fine with cats. But if big dog got through the conservatory door into the living room out the foyer....

So I'm gonna be a dog trainer. yup, working with a Springer Spaniel that's a Neighbor so it's crucile to build trust but not a big bond with a Springer that's a neighbor. So it's a matter of letting the Spaniel be a Spaniel. Hunt and fetch. group appreciation. Wooded walks. Alone time which was mildly enforced at first. oop, thier he is, hear him at least, night boy.
posted by clavdivs at 7:24 PM on September 2

I really want to hear other people's creativity productivity processes. In other words, what their work flow is, how they get past blocks, what their biggest breakthrough was in terms of figuring out how to make the process work, etc. And then, like, crosstalk between people to bugfix issues they're facing in their work flow...
posted by Cozybee at 9:01 AM on September 3 [1 favorite]

I had quit my meager monthly donation back in March when SXSW got cancelled & I had no idea if work was going to hold out, but it has, so today I turned it back on.
posted by Devils Rancher at 1:23 PM on September 6

Chatfilter #1 is go!
posted by taz (staff) at 9:33 AM on September 7

Your favorite recipe

Your favorite movie

Why I (each poster) should be the ruler of the galaxy
posted by medusa at 12:00 PM on September 7

Cereal? Cereal?
Everyone knows that the true burning question is "When you put on your shoes and socks, is it sock-sock-shoe-shoe or sock-shoe-sock-shoe?"
Then it gets broken down to right or left first, of course.
posted by Bill Watches Movies Podcast at 1:13 PM on September 7

I feel like the big debate is going to be Milk First/Cereal First. Then you get into which milk is worth drinking afterwards, do you pick a cereal specifically for the aftermilk, and we can talk about those monsters that don't even use milk

Only a monster starts with "how much milk do I want this morning?" You start with "how much cereal do I want?" and then you match the milk. In the event of overshooting the milk, you add more cereal instead of drinking plain milk or throwing away perfectly good milk. The cereal is the dependent variable. here.

"When you put on your shoes and socks, is it sock-sock-shoe-shoe or sock-shoe-sock-shoe?"

Again, this is opportunity to identify monsters who should be ostracized before spreading dangerous ideas. We need to establish some standards here. It's sock-sock, shoe + tie, then shoe+ tie.

While we are discussing universal standards of decent humans, Male-identified people pee standing up, peeing while sitting leads to much more dribbling and I can sometimes see dudes with a wet spot around the crotch on their pants. The weiner goes over the top of the elastic band, not through that weird hole that does left then right. You want nothing obstructing the straight ahead flow of the wiz.

Toilet paper flaps roll *under* the roll, because the other way, cats can create a TP treadmills with hundreds of feet of loose TP in the bathroom. Which is hilarious and entertaining but really bad for mother earth and preserving trees..

When you poop, you need to stay seated while you wipe, though it's really tempting to stand and admire what you've produced. Those butt cheeks stay separated while you are sitting and if you stand, that crease closes and you have a much harder clean up job. I highly recommend a daily psyllium husk supplement (= the "wipeless poo") and slathering some Aquaphor all over your butt crack after showering, just to reduce the Klingons after evacuation of the bowels.

I realize I am blunt in resolving these issues that reasonable people may struggle with, but it's more important to take executive action than to build consensus. I am your benevolent fascist; may I count on your vote in November?
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 6:58 PM on September 7 [1 favorite]

Entities that tie each shoe before putting on another shoe have only slightly better fitted human skin over their exoskeleton than the entities putting on a single sock, then a shoe, then another sock. This is the stuff eldritch horror is made from.
posted by Cozybee at 12:48 AM on September 8

If you pee standing up in my house, you get to clean the bathroom when you're done. Also, bidet, washlet, or just take a brief shower after you poop. Smearing shit around your anus with paper doesn't result in a clean anus. So, no, you and pee spatter and your stinky butt will not have my vote.
posted by seanmpuckett at 5:31 AM on September 8

Slarty Bartfast: "It's sock-sock, shoe + tie, then shoe+ tie. "

You're wearing 2 ties?
posted by chavenet at 6:36 AM on September 8

Well, you want your ankles to look symmetrical.
posted by curious nu at 12:51 PM on September 8

If you're putting your ties somewhere other than your ankles I don't even want to know.
posted by curious nu at 12:51 PM on September 8

- Thanks to theatro for our first week's topic, cereal chat!

VOTE YOUR HEART - List of chatfilter topics to vote on right now! (Suggest more in the thread and I can add 'em)

- 1 - socks socks socks (from Going to Maine)
- 2 - how much wood a woodchuck could counterfactually chuck (from cortex)
- 3 - pets or toddlers Being Naughty (from stillnocturnal)
- 4 - short science fiction stories (from Vatnesine)
- 5 - a yearly Purrformance review thread for our pets (from janepanic)
- 6 - is toilet paper dumb, and other questions about post-toilet procedure (from youarenothere)
- 7 - other people's creativity processes (from Cozybee)
- 8 - something that was common when you were a child that is appalling now, like smoking lounges in high schools (from Eyebrows McGee in staff slack)
- 9 - your favorite recipe (from medusa)
- 10 - your favorite movie (from medusa)
- 11 - Why I (each poster) should be the ruler of the galaxy (from medusa)
- 12 - When you put on your shoes and socks, is it sock-sock-shoe-shoe or sock-shoe-sock-shoe? (from Bill Watches Movies Podcast)

HOW TO VOTE: go to the Fundraising page to vote, one vote per US dollar, and then drop us a note at the Contact form and tell us what you're voting for and how many votes for each. Thank you!
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 11:00 AM on September 11 [2 favorites]

Chatfilter in the Blue #2 is up! Congratulations, youarenothere, you cleaned up with the $$$-winning topic for last week's vote!
posted by taz (staff) at 6:19 AM on September 14

Chatfilter #3 is on the front burner! Thank you, medusa, for your suggestion of recipes!
posted by taz (staff) at 6:21 AM on September 21

Came here after seeing the recipe post on the front page. I'm like whoaaaaa, I feel so...seen.

This will be a fun post!
posted by medusa at 9:56 AM on September 21 [1 favorite]

#4 has been posted: janepanic, the purrformance evaluations are underway!
posted by taz (staff) at 11:14 AM on September 26

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