Neverending Stories

What if we never closed old comment threads?

This follow-up to an old AskMe makes me wonder how many other nuggets of wisdom we miss out on. bondcliff asked, could I make my own pizza from *real* scratch. Months later, fermezporte points to a restaurant that does exactly that. When the thread gets closed, we may never know how bondcliff's own pizza tasted.

This has been brought to the floor before but I'm unconvinced it would damage the sanctity of our history, or whatever the perceived risk is.

posted by jayCampbell to feature requests at 10:00 PM (86 comments total)

heresy!
posted by blue_beetle at 10:05 PM on June 2

Will someone think of the longboaters?
posted by Burhanistan at 10:06 PM on June 2

Thar be Dragons.
posted by iamabot at 10:06 PM on June 2

Ask MeFi threads are open for one full year, so I think that includes a complete growing season for bondcliff to get his wheat, tomatoes, and cows going for this Fall's big pizza party at his house (that we're all invited to).
posted by mathowie at 10:07 PM on June 2 [4 favorites]

A fully self-sustaining pizza farm would require two years for the onions to go seed-to-seed.
posted by jayCampbell at 10:09 PM on June 2

Onions? Surely you jest...
posted by awfurby at 10:15 PM on June 2

Metatalk posts: Metafilter Related. Done.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 10:15 PM on June 2 [2 favorites]

Metatalk posts: Metafilter Related. Done.

So you're saying that since this is a question about AskMe it is inappropriate for MetaTalk?
posted by tkolar at 10:43 PM on June 2

Onions? Surely you jest? Surely you jest?
posted by pompomtom at 10:52 PM on June 2

I think that was more of a Bingo, as we've now run the gamut of metatalk options (after a cluster of etiquette)
posted by mrzarquon at 10:54 PM on June 2

Seriously. A pizza doesn't have onions.
posted by Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America at 10:54 PM on June 2 [1 favorite]

I just want to know what happened with the james bond party entrance.
posted by puke & cry at 10:59 PM on June 2 [2 favorites]

There was a time when old threads were not closed, and what happened is that some users laid claim to very old threads and turned them into private chat sessions, or into personal blogs.

For instance, the legendary #1142.
posted by Class Goat at 10:59 PM on June 2

What if we never closed old comment threads?

That way lies madness, a madness with 19 wizened, hairy arms, each arm with 1142 gnarled, grasping hands, each hand with 9622 slashing, bloodstained talons.
posted by dersins at 11:08 PM on June 2 [1 favorite]

Um, tkolar, I'm saying that if there's a followup to be posted after a whole year, it can be posted in MeTa.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:26 PM on June 2

(or memailed, when more appropriate)
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:29 PM on June 2

A pizza can totally have onions. Nothing wrong with that.

No barbecued chicken on pizza, though. Ever.
posted by rtha at 11:31 PM on June 2

*Shakes head disapprovingly at rtha*
posted by ooga_booga at 12:04 AM on June 3

What if we closed this thread?
posted by chillmost at 12:08 AM on June 3

The comments for every new FPP would start out with loud complaints that a previous, tangentally related thread is still open.
posted by Artw at 12:17 AM on June 3 [5 favorites]

Pizza: tomato sauce, cheese, mushrooms, black olives, ham, sausage, sun dried tomatoes. That is the only real pizze, everything else that anyone else likes is bad and wrong.
posted by Meatbomb at 1:02 AM on June 3

interesting.
posted by eyeballkid at 1:33 AM on June 3

Seriously. A pizza doesn't have onions.

Onions can be very appropriate for a pizza. I have certainly enjoyed some peppers and onions or sausage and onions pizzas.

In any case, onions are, while not necessary as long as you have garlic, a worthwhile ingredient in the sauce.

Pizza: tomato sauce, cheese, mushrooms, black olives, ham, sausage, sun dried tomatoes. That is the only real pizze, everything else that anyone else likes is bad and wrong.

Dude, I am somewhat upset to disagree with you because you have more of my Approval than most on this website, but the pure form of pizza is crust, tomato sauce, and cheese, or, depending on location and fanciness, curst, tomatoes, cheese, and basil. The crust, sauce, and cheese are to be of such excellent quality that this is a flavorful delight in and of itself. Your topping additions of mushrooms, olive, ham, sausage, and sundried tomatoes are quite commendable and appropriate (compare to the crimes against humanity that the Californians or especially the Japanese will commit on a pizza) especially in cases where sundry intoxications may increase the appetite, but not required.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 1:34 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

A pizza can have onions. My pizza cannot have onions.
posted by aubilenon at 1:40 AM on June 3

Metatalk posts: Metafilter Related. Done.

You missed a step before that: Add comments. Reduce.
posted by SteveInMaine at 2:04 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

I had an awesome pizza with lamb and yoghurt on it once. Mmmm.
posted by jacalata at 2:09 AM on June 3

Hey, what about mayonnaise on a pizza? That sounds awful.
posted by jbickers at 2:35 AM on June 3

I'm an anchovies (oil packed, not salt), small Pantelleria capers and green peppercorns man myself, which is probably unpardonable heresy to hardcore oven-modifying pizza crackpots, but tastes abso-sodding-lutely delicious.
posted by jack_mo at 2:37 AM on June 3

The pure, primal form of pizza is pizza bianca - any other toppings are just a bonus for your mouth.
posted by romakimmy at 3:01 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

Ah, but, Japan is the land of bizzarro pizza, my friends. Anything goes!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 3:23 AM on June 3

And, yeah, jbickers Pokemon pizza link above is just further proof.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 3:24 AM on June 3

San Marcos' onion and garlic pizza, or Cono's (up on Graham(?still there?)) marinara.

What's all this crazy 'must have these ingredients' business? As long as it isn't ham and pineapple.
posted by From Bklyn at 3:49 AM on June 3

What if it snowed in San Francisco?
posted by burnmp3s at 4:10 AM on June 3

Holy crap, thanks for pointing that out! Now I need to get my hippie ass to Wisconsin.

Some sort of alert would be nice. Say, if someone posts in your thread thirty days after it starts you get a MeMail.

Follow up: I haven't made the pizza yet, though I still plan to. Yes, you're all invited. Well, except for the 27000 - 28500 users. I hate those guys.

Onions are perfectly fine on a pizza, just as long as there aren't too many.
posted by bondcliff at 5:36 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

Pizza: onions good, mustard bad.
posted by Pax at 6:22 AM on June 3

Damn this thread. Now I have the theme from the Neverending Story on repeat in my brain. Over and over and over: "NEVERENDING STOORRRRYYYYY, ahahaaaaah, ahahaaaaah ahahaaaaah" Now I need a powerdrill.
posted by waraw at 6:26 AM on June 3

We have a widget called "AskMe straggler comments" that shows us when people have posted in very old threads. A lot of times it's just follow-up stuff but occasionally people put little spammy stuff in there. If all threads were always open this would magnify the problem, I am certain. Maybe what we need are more regular "so, didja eat it?" follow-up MeTa threads?
posted by jessamyn at 6:29 AM on June 3

Anchois.
Pineapple.
Bacon.

Best. 'Za. Ev.
posted by Dizzy at 6:32 AM on June 3

Or maybe just allow the OP to post comments to the thread after the 1-year limit? Prevents chattiness, allows for very late updates such as a user finding the thread and MeMailing the OP the answer...

Also: cheese pizza for me, babies.
posted by flibbertigibbet at 6:43 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

Maybe what we need are more regular "so, didja eat it?" follow-up MeTa threads?

Personally, I'm wondering what happened with this and this.

Or maybe just allow the OP to post comments to the thread after the 1-year limit?

That'll happen right along when an OP's AskMe comments are made to stand out, and with the creation of AnalogMe. By which I mean, won't happen at all.
posted by cashman at 6:55 AM on June 3

Indian. Or Jalapeno-Pineapple, with Ranch.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 7:01 AM on June 3

Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America writes "Seriously. A pizza doesn't have onions."

Your missing out man.

UbuRoivas writes "So what kind of lunatic do you think would trawl through old questions & answer them long after the OP has either taken the advice or otherwise moved on? And do we really want that kind of weirdo here?"

Well, I do this now sometimes when things are slow. I'll hit the archives from a eleven months ago and see if there are any orphan or semi orphan questions that I missed the first time. Guess you're stuck with me whether you want me or not. Sorry for the extra work jessamyn.

bondcliff writes "Some sort of alert would be nice. Say, if someone posts in your thread thirty days after it starts you get a MeMail."

Recent activity shows you new comments on old threads, even 360 day old askmes.
posted by Mitheral at 7:01 AM on June 3

Stick to treaties and leave the pizza to the Italian-Americans, Meatbomb.
posted by Mister_A at 7:02 AM on June 3

Flammküchen!
posted by chillmost at 7:17 AM on June 3

I put carmelized onions on the last pizza I made. Turned out quite well, I thought.

Also, I've recently taken to mixing some herbs and spices into tomato paste, letting it refrigerate at least 24 hours, then using that in place of the regular tomato sauce. It has to be spread on the crust; it's much too thick to just be ladled on and pushed around with the ladle. I'm rather happy with this technique; it gives it a more intense tomato flavor, and helps with the toppings-sliding-off-of-the-crust problem.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 7:20 AM on June 3

Keep Our Pizza Pure. Google Ron Paul.
posted by mullacc at 7:32 AM on June 3

Onions. Kalamata olives. Feta cheese. Green peppers. Mushrooms. Why, yes, I am fond of salt, why do you ask? Ham and pineapple are an abomination unto the pizza gods.

What if there was an AskMe sidebar and on this sidebar, new activity in old threads could be highlighted? Sort of the way they have at Monkeyfilter but just for threads that are more than, oh, say, 15 days old. That might be kind of cool and then, if James Bond entrance man ever comes back (I think he ate the wrong thing . ) we'll all be notified right away.
posted by mygothlaundry at 7:52 AM on June 3

does anyone read the posts down here?
posted by shmegegge at 8:06 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

So what kind of lunatic do you think would trawl through old questions & answer them long after the OP has either taken the advice or otherwise moved on? And do we really want that kind of weirdo here?

Like Jess said, we actually get a (low volume) mix of asker followups and late answers. The followups are obviously unimpeachable, and by my really hazy estimate most of them come along with in the first three or four months.

The late answers should really be late "answers" 80% of the time. Past the three month mark or so, maybe a fifth of the non-original-asker comments we see are from mefites giving a late good faith answer, and the other four fifths or so are spammers volunteering for bannination. (Tracking down the spammers is what inspired our Straggler tool in the first place, actually.)

So I agree that leaving questions open forever would most likely just exacerbate the spam problem (man, you should have seen this flock of goldfarmers & avatar resellers we found in a World of Warcraft question when we first built that tool) without much improving the late-update situation. Folks seem to, as AV suggested, do a decent job of deciding when a late update just gets a Metatalk thread, and that pretty much takes care of the year+ later update issue.
posted by cortex at 8:17 AM on June 3

Pizza: onions good, mustard bad.

Not so! Cheeseburger pizza with a mustard base is divine!
posted by lysdexic at 8:19 AM on June 3

Atreu!
posted by lysdexic at 8:21 AM on June 3

I seriously almost posted this yesterday, but with regards to a regular old MeFi post. It was some indepth article about You Tube divorcee Tricia Walsh-Smith, that wasn't worth it's own post, but would be informative for anyone reading the original post. How long do MeFi threads stay open anyway? The TWS post was only about a month and a half old, but had already hit the archives.
posted by yellowbinder at 8:42 AM on June 3

Blue and grey threads are archived after one month (except for meetup threads, which stay open for six). Askme threads are a year; Music threads are forever. Don't know what we did with the new Projects threads, come to think of it.
posted by cortex at 8:44 AM on June 3

A good, if noncanonical, pizza: tzatziki, gyro meat, and onions.
posted by Wolfdog at 8:48 AM on June 3

cashman says Personally, I'm wondering what happened with this and this.

Thanks for bringing that first one to my attention. I missed that last year and found it to be a great read. Now I too wonder if the OP ever figured things out.

As for pizza, I made a delicious one the other night. Fresh dough with a olive oil and pesto base, topped with mozzarella, red onion, garlic, red pepper, spinach and bacon. Splendid!
posted by friendlyjuan at 8:55 AM on June 3

Another good pizza to order some time if you enjoy the internet is none pizza left beef.
posted by cortex at 9:09 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

You could set up an auto-MeMail to the OP some period of time (a week?) before the thread is closed. In a slightly passive/agressive way, the mail could remind them that the thread will close soon and they should post any updates soon if they want.
posted by patricio at 9:13 AM on June 3

Ham and pineapple are an abomination unto the pizza gods.

No. Pinapple is an abomination unto the pizza gods, but they make ham pizza in Buenos Aires, the home of great pizza, so it is by definition good. Otherwise, what The Only Cool Tim said.
posted by languagehat at 9:35 AM on June 3

Pinapple is an abomination unto the pizza gods

You are hereby disowened, bucko.
posted by cortex at 9:47 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

A year does seem to be a long time. However I just posted to a thread about something relatively obscure within that window (I was curious as to whether anybody had ever asked such a question and did a search by tags.)
posted by squid patrol at 9:48 AM on June 3

You will find some truly intriguing ideas about pizza on this menu.
posted by Wolfdog at 10:10 AM on June 3

Christ, I spelled it wrong. Let's pretend that was some kind of complicated oblique reference to mefi history.
posted by cortex at 10:37 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

Put whatever the hell you like on your damn pizza, tards.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:41 AM on June 3 [2 favorites]

A good, if noncanonical, pizza: tzatziki, gyro meat, and onions.

Hell yeah. Pitza. Love it. Not really pizza, but delicious.
posted by dersins at 10:42 AM on June 3

All the old boingboing threads are hacked and spammed with crap; they have lost so much of the original that they rarely make sense.
You'd need another full time mod just to keep them clean.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 10:47 AM on June 3

Maybe people that want to yak about whether so-and-so ever actually ate the whatever could do that on old boingboing threads. Win-win!
posted by Wolfdog at 10:56 AM on June 3

To me, the best kind of pizza is just plain old delicious cheese. No onions or pineapples or anything other than the perfection that is an uncomplicated slice of cheesy goodness.

Of course, it has to Uncle Enzo's CosaNostra Pizza and be hand provided by an armorgel clad deliverator, but that's just a given.
posted by quin at 11:40 AM on June 3

Let's pretend that was some kind of complicated oblique reference to mefi history.

Actually, I just assumed that's what it was, such was my respect for you. But now I know the sad truth.
posted by languagehat at 11:50 AM on June 3 [1 favorite]

I have a firm policy of not correcting spelling errors in a comment after it has been favorited, but I'm not above shattering dreams with a followup erratum.
posted by cortex at 12:02 PM on June 3

U BIN POWENED
posted by Mister_A at 12:28 PM on June 3 [1 favorite]

The worst pizza I've ever had was in Paris. I don't know much food-related vocabulary, so I just picked a pizza off the menu at random and figured I'd pick off what I didn't like. How bad could it be, right? Well, when I got the thing, it had a HUGE dollop of cream in the middle, and atop that was a barely-cooked sunny-side up egg, which yolk promptly drizzled all over the pizza. What. The. Fuck was I supposed to do with THAT? Unfortunately I had barely any money left, so I carried it back to my hotel room and attempted to eat it, sans utensils or plate. I feel badly for the maid who had to smell that emanating from the garbage the next morning.
posted by desjardins at 2:00 PM on June 3

it had a HUGE dollop of cream in the middle, and atop that was a barely-cooked sunny-side up egg, which yolk promptly drizzled all over the pizza.

That sounds awesome. Seriously. I have to try that. Was it cream or creme fraiche?
posted by dersins at 2:02 PM on June 3

It does sound kind of interesting - I'm googling it at the moment to see if it's some common french pizza style and failing.
posted by Artw at 2:08 PM on June 3

Your worst pizza ever had a real life EGG on it? And CREAM? Real food products? I take it you did not attend a US public school.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 2:12 PM on June 3

I always go for sushi.
posted by Artw at 2:24 PM on June 3

Mmmm. Delicious sounding french pizza.

Now I'm hungry, you fuckers
posted by Artw at 2:25 PM on June 3

It's not pizza until it has onions on it.
posted by deborah at 2:54 PM on June 3

I take it you did not attend a US public school.

Remember when it was "pizza" day? Which was like twice a week, usually. That rectangular affront to palates was consumed only after using two or three napkins to soak up the grease slick on the top.
posted by Burhanistan at 2:58 PM on June 3

Mmm. Heat-lamp food.
posted by Artw at 3:49 PM on June 3

You went to Paris, the capitol of arguably the greatest country of the food world... home of Escoffier, Jacques Pepin, Guillaume Tirel, François Pierre La Varenne, Marie-Antoine Carême, not to mention all the other great chefs inspired by centuries of french cuisine, and you ordered pizza?

I was broke and exhausted, it was 10 pm, many restaurants were closed, and I just wanted some food and to crash. This place was a block from my hotel. I'm not maligning Parisian cuisine in the slightest - I've had many good meals there. This particular place seemed to be run by immigrants (Greek, I believe), so I'm not sure this was a French delicacy or an import. Btw, I find French spoken with a Greek accent to be completely unintelligible.
posted by desjardins at 3:56 PM on June 3

It was somewhere on the south side of rue St Antoine, prés de la Place de la Bastille.
posted by desjardins at 4:07 PM on June 3 [1 favorite]

I've had pizza with an egg (just the yolk, usually) plopped in the middle lots of times in France - just barely set, presumably added the second the pizza comes out of the oven so it can cook a little bit on the way to the table, which means you can swizzle it all over the other toppings before you tuck in. Lovely. It's called Pizza alla Bismarck, though I somehow doubt that the unifier of Germany was an eggy pizza man.
posted by jack_mo at 4:23 AM on June 4

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