Rejoice! It's the Underappreciated Comments of 2017! January 9, 2018 8:16 PM Subscribe
Although many of us are understandably eager to put this year behind us, we cannot do so without observing the time-honored tradition of toasting the comments that made us laugh, cry, or cheer in 2017, but for whatever reason, didn't receive the acclaim that they deserved.
Which comments made by fellow MeFites in 2017 deserve more attention? This is the place to share your own Best Of! As is traditional, please try to stick to comments that received 12 or fewer favorites, and no self-links.
2016, 2015, 2014, 2013...
Hat tip to MonkeyToes, who often posts this thread, but kindly granted me the joy of posting it this year!
Which comments made by fellow MeFites in 2017 deserve more attention? This is the place to share your own Best Of! As is traditional, please try to stick to comments that received 12 or fewer favorites, and no self-links.
2016, 2015, 2014, 2013...
Hat tip to MonkeyToes, who often posts this thread, but kindly granted me the joy of posting it this year!
mintcake! simultaneously satirises self-important ad execs and captures the MeFi commenting experience
posted by Panthalassa at 1:38 AM on January 10, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by Panthalassa at 1:38 AM on January 10, 2018 [2 favorites]
jamjam - discusses their "friend" who had an unorthodox entry to Seattle's Space Needle.
Yes, it has 19 favorites (as of now), but I literally will just randomly laugh throughout the day when I think about it, so I still think 19 favorites is criminally underrated.
posted by Literaryhero at 4:02 AM on January 10, 2018 [8 favorites]
Yes, it has 19 favorites (as of now), but I literally will just randomly laugh throughout the day when I think about it, so I still think 19 favorites is criminally underrated.
posted by Literaryhero at 4:02 AM on January 10, 2018 [8 favorites]
Oh, and nonspecifically there are tons of fantastic comments in Fanfare but it seems like no one favorites anything over there.
posted by Literaryhero at 4:02 AM on January 10, 2018 [7 favorites]
posted by Literaryhero at 4:02 AM on January 10, 2018 [7 favorites]
I love these threads. I always miss some really funny stuff.
posted by 80 Cats in a Dog Suit at 5:35 AM on January 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by 80 Cats in a Dog Suit at 5:35 AM on January 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
Jane the Brown’s excellent explanation on why the rich planning to ride out the apocalypse in secret millionaire bunkers aren’t going to do well. A mere 10 favorites.
Excerpt: “My understanding about how these things work out historically is that the rich find shelters and hole up in them, sending the remaining surviving troops to control/massacre the poor people, just in case the poor people try to storm their shelters, or claim the ruined estates they want to keep but not to return to. The troops will shoot a few people who are trying to salvage their own possessions for looting, and then will dissolve when their pay fails to materialize and they start to worry about their mothers, so they go home. . . .
The rich, poor souls, will last for awhile, but they believe in society, since they need enforceable contracts and property law and stuff like that. But having isolated themselves from the mob of people who are busy scavenging the ruins and setting up new town crier communication systems, and hospitals and food pooling areas, they no longer have a society that will either defer to them, or follow the law to protect them. So all it will take is one or two criminals who will look at the bunker and decide that if 148 of the wealthy condo units were empty, they could sell them to brand new investors. It's possible the guy that goes through the silo-condo will be one of the hired security guards, but unlikely. More likely it will be the son of one of the wealthy survivalists, who is bored and pissed off at being included in the chore roster, so he will get four or five of his cocaine buddies to join him and hold a shooting spree.”
posted by a fiendish thingy at 6:56 AM on January 10, 2018 [7 favorites]
Excerpt: “My understanding about how these things work out historically is that the rich find shelters and hole up in them, sending the remaining surviving troops to control/massacre the poor people, just in case the poor people try to storm their shelters, or claim the ruined estates they want to keep but not to return to. The troops will shoot a few people who are trying to salvage their own possessions for looting, and then will dissolve when their pay fails to materialize and they start to worry about their mothers, so they go home. . . .
The rich, poor souls, will last for awhile, but they believe in society, since they need enforceable contracts and property law and stuff like that. But having isolated themselves from the mob of people who are busy scavenging the ruins and setting up new town crier communication systems, and hospitals and food pooling areas, they no longer have a society that will either defer to them, or follow the law to protect them. So all it will take is one or two criminals who will look at the bunker and decide that if 148 of the wealthy condo units were empty, they could sell them to brand new investors. It's possible the guy that goes through the silo-condo will be one of the hired security guards, but unlikely. More likely it will be the son of one of the wealthy survivalists, who is bored and pissed off at being included in the chore roster, so he will get four or five of his cocaine buddies to join him and hold a shooting spree.”
posted by a fiendish thingy at 6:56 AM on January 10, 2018 [7 favorites]
In the thread about the free online legal advice clinic, 256 quips that "This might be the only place on the Internet where people don't anal."
posted by J.K. Seazer at 9:15 AM on January 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by J.K. Seazer at 9:15 AM on January 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
ActingTheGoat proposes what you should do with Sword Guys instead of bone them.
TheWhiteSkull gets pedantic about phaetons in the same thread (TWS, you are my people)!
DrAstroZoom's story of a poisonous owl didn't get nearly enough love given how hard it made me laugh.
radicalawyer comes for the lives of all (right-thinking) Chicagoans.
Languagehat responds briefly to the question, "What's the weirdest/worst/dumbest/most obnoxious thing in your kitchen?"
no robots implements a cunning idea in a "How to find lost things," thread.
curious nu inflicts upon us a terrible, terrible joke.
poffin boffin has some issues with Channing Tatum's outfit in Jupiter Ascending.
Another from poffin boffin, who apparently loves Chopped as much as I do.
crush-onastick knows what's up.
praemunire knows what CSA actually stands for, in case you were wondering.
prismatic7 coins the word beansmuggery.
Brandon Blatcher changes the way I refer to myself and other Mac users forever.
Pinback with the catchiest tune ever.
Ennis Tennyone supplies a fun fact.
This whole thread was hilarious, but allthinky made me laugh the hardest in the "How do you clean the back of your ears?" thread.
posted by merriment at 9:29 AM on January 10, 2018 [9 favorites]
TheWhiteSkull gets pedantic about phaetons in the same thread (TWS, you are my people)!
DrAstroZoom's story of a poisonous owl didn't get nearly enough love given how hard it made me laugh.
radicalawyer comes for the lives of all (right-thinking) Chicagoans.
Languagehat responds briefly to the question, "What's the weirdest/worst/dumbest/most obnoxious thing in your kitchen?"
no robots implements a cunning idea in a "How to find lost things," thread.
curious nu inflicts upon us a terrible, terrible joke.
poffin boffin has some issues with Channing Tatum's outfit in Jupiter Ascending.
Another from poffin boffin, who apparently loves Chopped as much as I do.
crush-onastick knows what's up.
praemunire knows what CSA actually stands for, in case you were wondering.
prismatic7 coins the word beansmuggery.
Brandon Blatcher changes the way I refer to myself and other Mac users forever.
Pinback with the catchiest tune ever.
Ennis Tennyone supplies a fun fact.
This whole thread was hilarious, but allthinky made me laugh the hardest in the "How do you clean the back of your ears?" thread.
posted by merriment at 9:29 AM on January 10, 2018 [9 favorites]
Most of mine seem to be cat pictures. Ones that are not:
zompist on fabric and luxury words from Arabic and Persian.
Kattullus on the origins of the novel.
Mike Mongo on naming cats (with bonus ginger cat).
fraula on family history and smiling.
emilyw about her mother's life.
mogget wondering about the Cat Vision spell.
comealongpole on family memories and the Mary Rose.
posted by paduasoy at 9:37 AM on January 10, 2018 [7 favorites]
zompist on fabric and luxury words from Arabic and Persian.
Kattullus on the origins of the novel.
Mike Mongo on naming cats (with bonus ginger cat).
fraula on family history and smiling.
emilyw about her mother's life.
mogget wondering about the Cat Vision spell.
comealongpole on family memories and the Mary Rose.
posted by paduasoy at 9:37 AM on January 10, 2018 [7 favorites]
○ I use my Stewart's calculus textbooks as a computer stand. I think that it's literally the most expensive piece of furniture that I own.
○ So timely. Watching an episode of Alfred Hitchcock Presents yesterday, the dudes at the boarding house where Dick York and the guy who stole money from him who he was trying to make crazy fought over who got the celery heart because the same guy was taking it all the time, and I thought "how much celery are you being served if you've got a feud about it?", and now, I guess I know.
○ I do not have strong feelings either way about NiN in general or in this episode in particular, but a friend of mine recently pointed out that Trent Reznor's name spelled backwards is Ron Zertnert.
I have carried this information in troubled silence for weeks now.
○ Too bad Ingmar Bergman never got a chance to turn The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning into a film.
posted by phunniemee at 9:55 AM on January 10, 2018 [11 favorites]
○ So timely. Watching an episode of Alfred Hitchcock Presents yesterday, the dudes at the boarding house where Dick York and the guy who stole money from him who he was trying to make crazy fought over who got the celery heart because the same guy was taking it all the time, and I thought "how much celery are you being served if you've got a feud about it?", and now, I guess I know.
○ I do not have strong feelings either way about NiN in general or in this episode in particular, but a friend of mine recently pointed out that Trent Reznor's name spelled backwards is Ron Zertnert.
I have carried this information in troubled silence for weeks now.
○ Too bad Ingmar Bergman never got a chance to turn The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning into a film.
posted by phunniemee at 9:55 AM on January 10, 2018 [11 favorites]
Buried at the end of a long and contentious MeTa, pharm posts a great link about how to (and how not to) manage anxiety in the age of Trump.
Librarina posts great guidelines on how focussing not on how people fuck up but how they respond to gentle correction when they fuck up is a good way to protect vulnerable populations in a community and weed out assholes without requiring perfection from community members.
Finally, a horse creates an account just to express horror at the resurrection of equine diseases, and flounces off the site when faced with insensitive jokes at the expense of Equine-Americans.
posted by firechicago at 10:02 AM on January 10, 2018 [12 favorites]
Librarina posts great guidelines on how focussing not on how people fuck up but how they respond to gentle correction when they fuck up is a good way to protect vulnerable populations in a community and weed out assholes without requiring perfection from community members.
Finally, a horse creates an account just to express horror at the resurrection of equine diseases, and flounces off the site when faced with insensitive jokes at the expense of Equine-Americans.
posted by firechicago at 10:02 AM on January 10, 2018 [12 favorites]
I made a casual, random joke about "What would happen if John Woo directed The Sound of Music?", and leotrotsky just happened to have this gif handy. It's not the most earth-shattering of comments, but it was a case of having the perfect gif at the perfect time.
posted by Elly Vortex at 11:01 AM on January 10, 2018 [14 favorites]
posted by Elly Vortex at 11:01 AM on January 10, 2018 [14 favorites]
cakelite ended up with an interesting takeaway after reading James Herriot as a child.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 11:35 AM on January 10, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 11:35 AM on January 10, 2018 [2 favorites]
I love that we do this every year. Fun chance to review the year of underappreciated favorites!
staggering termagant: Hey ma, you got a rompah?
windbox: Ghost with your gut.
I_Love_Bananas: Work is not life. It feels like life, but it's not.
lollusc: I took a professional development course recently where the facilitator rewarded for participation or good answers by giving them potatoes. Raw potatoes. (How am I the ONLY person to have favorited that??!)
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 11:52 AM on January 10, 2018 [7 favorites]
staggering termagant: Hey ma, you got a rompah?
windbox: Ghost with your gut.
I_Love_Bananas: Work is not life. It feels like life, but it's not.
lollusc: I took a professional development course recently where the facilitator rewarded for participation or good answers by giving them potatoes. Raw potatoes. (How am I the ONLY person to have favorited that??!)
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 11:52 AM on January 10, 2018 [7 favorites]
LEGO Damashii identifies the source of Tony Soprano's ringtone after I wondered about its origin.
posted by exogenous at 12:17 PM on January 10, 2018
posted by exogenous at 12:17 PM on January 10, 2018
secretariat's comment about smearing her "basic bits": I can just head on over to somebody else's garden and smear my basic flower bits all over their fancy plants without causing any damage!
posted by jillithd at 12:31 PM on January 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by jillithd at 12:31 PM on January 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
The entirety of the Strange New Worlds thread. But especially this gem from webmutant.
Greg_Ace makes a mooving pun.
posted by zarq at 12:46 PM on January 10, 2018
Greg_Ace makes a mooving pun.
posted by zarq at 12:46 PM on January 10, 2018
Eponysterical pumpkining from The Great David S. Pumpkins.
And another from Ruki in the same thread.
posted by jillithd at 12:56 PM on January 10, 2018
And another from Ruki in the same thread.
posted by jillithd at 12:56 PM on January 10, 2018
Maybe I should have posted that "Keeping Calm in an Anxious World" link to the blue, but it seemed a bit thin all by itself. Glad to hear it helped someone, even from it’s lowly position at the bottom of a metatalk.
Anyway (checks favourites) I nominate Combat Wombat for their tale of Upper 6th Chemistry shenanigans.
posted by pharm at 2:21 PM on January 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
Anyway (checks favourites) I nominate Combat Wombat for their tale of Upper 6th Chemistry shenanigans.
posted by pharm at 2:21 PM on January 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
Squee! I've always wanted to be mentioned in these end of year posts, and now I have! A few weeks ago, a comment of mine was taglined for the first time, so I'm just hitting all my MeFi dreams lately!
Anyway, The Great David S. Pumpkins gave the most delightfully in-character answer to my pumpkin question in that thread mentioned above. (Said pumpkin was never carved and has since rotted and frozen on my porch. I brought it outside intending to put it into the woods for the animals, never did, there was a cold snap which preserved it, then a warm day where I walked outside and saw that it had suddenly melted onto my milk crate, immediately followed by a long string of sub freezing days where it's been frozen to said milk crate ever since. Um, yeah.)
posted by Ruki at 2:38 PM on January 10, 2018 [3 favorites]
Anyway, The Great David S. Pumpkins gave the most delightfully in-character answer to my pumpkin question in that thread mentioned above. (Said pumpkin was never carved and has since rotted and frozen on my porch. I brought it outside intending to put it into the woods for the animals, never did, there was a cold snap which preserved it, then a warm day where I walked outside and saw that it had suddenly melted onto my milk crate, immediately followed by a long string of sub freezing days where it's been frozen to said milk crate ever since. Um, yeah.)
posted by Ruki at 2:38 PM on January 10, 2018 [3 favorites]
tapir-whorf reminds us that DIY is alive and well in this helpful comment about darning.
posted by MonkeyToes at 4:56 PM on January 10, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by MonkeyToes at 4:56 PM on January 10, 2018 [2 favorites]
Wheeeee! This is all wonderful, and I can't wait to see what people dig out.
This three-comment exchange from billiebee, double block & bleed, and Too-Ticky about peeing in sinks had me about dying with laughter for days.
This whole 15-favorite post from marxcharvist on cereal box monkeys is gold, but I'd like to highlight thelonius' forward-thinking father and Chrysotom's lesson about the depths of pedantry to which we all are capable of sinking.
I would totally marry barchan based on her stunning Brooklyn 99 dating profile.
mudpuppie survived an attack by a killer turkey, and we should all be grateful.
This understandably anonymous MeFite asked the cold unforgiving internet whether mice eat human semen, and I think we should all stop to appreciate that.
And uh, then I hit the Women's March as I went through January comments, and I started crying (not in a bad way, I promise) and fuck, I gotta sit down. Will pick up again in February.
posted by sciatrix at 5:50 PM on January 10, 2018 [4 favorites]
This three-comment exchange from billiebee, double block & bleed, and Too-Ticky about peeing in sinks had me about dying with laughter for days.
This whole 15-favorite post from marxcharvist on cereal box monkeys is gold, but I'd like to highlight thelonius' forward-thinking father and Chrysotom's lesson about the depths of pedantry to which we all are capable of sinking.
I would totally marry barchan based on her stunning Brooklyn 99 dating profile.
mudpuppie survived an attack by a killer turkey, and we should all be grateful.
This understandably anonymous MeFite asked the cold unforgiving internet whether mice eat human semen, and I think we should all stop to appreciate that.
And uh, then I hit the Women's March as I went through January comments, and I started crying (not in a bad way, I promise) and fuck, I gotta sit down. Will pick up again in February.
posted by sciatrix at 5:50 PM on January 10, 2018 [4 favorites]
Yes! One of my favorite MeTa traditions.
dances_with_sneetches had a great one-liner about 2017 and SF novels.
bleep suggests the scientific method for writing papers (and it's great! I'm going to use it with students!)
medusa has a frustrating toddler who sings Taio Cruz songs at inopportune moments
theseldomseenkid has a great sad story about their dad and locks
LionIndex speaks truth about San Diegans and sports teams
oneswellfoop insightfully points out the passing of the baton from Wal-Mart to Amazon
explosion has a fun take on the controversial sandwich boundaries (read with caution! you will have Opinions)
zippy has a good corollary to blue_beetle's statement about customers and products
Homeboy Trouble links to an amazing article about the Calgary Zoo during some flooding
posted by librarylis at 7:18 PM on January 10, 2018 [2 favorites]
dances_with_sneetches had a great one-liner about 2017 and SF novels.
bleep suggests the scientific method for writing papers (and it's great! I'm going to use it with students!)
medusa has a frustrating toddler who sings Taio Cruz songs at inopportune moments
theseldomseenkid has a great sad story about their dad and locks
LionIndex speaks truth about San Diegans and sports teams
oneswellfoop insightfully points out the passing of the baton from Wal-Mart to Amazon
explosion has a fun take on the controversial sandwich boundaries (read with caution! you will have Opinions)
zippy has a good corollary to blue_beetle's statement about customers and products
Homeboy Trouble links to an amazing article about the Calgary Zoo during some flooding
posted by librarylis at 7:18 PM on January 10, 2018 [2 favorites]
I love reading these and was beginning to look back from my own favourites from last year to contribute but i got like six pages in an it is still january and stiv bannon is on the ntional security council and sean spicer isnt meliisa mccarthy yet he is just a nut scolding reporters about corwd size and i need to get drunk now
posted by ricochet biscuit at 8:04 PM on January 10, 2018 [5 favorites]
posted by ricochet biscuit at 8:04 PM on January 10, 2018 [5 favorites]
why, thankyou merriment!
Chiming in for:
posted by prismatic7 at 2:30 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
Chiming in for:
- flabdablet's canonical evocation of the Aussie Hamburger.
- The lovely things that happened to MeFites in this Metatalktail Hour.
- DoctorFedora gives us all cardiovascular disease.
- AFABulous speaks nothing but truth (my appreciation of this is entirely due to personal circumstances.)
- MeFites interrogating Optimistic Nihilism.
- It's Raining Florence Henderson gives us the pie tagline we need.
- byanyothername on the significance of sartorial choices.
posted by prismatic7 at 2:30 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
restless_nomad replying to my metatalk request:
This seems reasonable enough that we're now suspicious that it is hard for some reason.
roll truck roll on the NFL made me laugh:
Can't they just declare a winner and be done with it? How many more years do they need?
We should do this thread, but only self-links. I want to see what people think was their best comment of the year.
posted by cichlid ceilidh at 7:06 AM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
This seems reasonable enough that we're now suspicious that it is hard for some reason.
roll truck roll on the NFL made me laugh:
Can't they just declare a winner and be done with it? How many more years do they need?
We should do this thread, but only self-links. I want to see what people think was their best comment of the year.
posted by cichlid ceilidh at 7:06 AM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
That Aussie Hamburger thread prismatic7 links to is amazing. It's my favorite kind of thread where even the explanations create questions:
It's a bloody hamburger, not a ham and salad sandwich (which also has beetroot).
A what sandwich? Also, is tomato sauce ketchup?
posted by Rock Steady at 7:11 AM on January 11, 2018
It's a bloody hamburger, not a ham and salad sandwich (which also has beetroot).
A what sandwich? Also, is tomato sauce ketchup?
posted by Rock Steady at 7:11 AM on January 11, 2018
A what sandwich?
Ham and salad.
Also, is tomato sauce ketchup?
Heinz’s Decades-Long Attempt to Convince Australia That Ketchup Is Awesome
Ham and salad.
Also, is tomato sauce ketchup?
Heinz’s Decades-Long Attempt to Convince Australia That Ketchup Is Awesome
But ketchup does seem to be a much harder sell. In 2012, the company closed its local ketchup factory, after 70 years of existence, and moved its production to New Zealand. In a final indignity, the Australian Broadcasting Corporation reported the news as “Heinz tomato sauce factory closes.”posted by zamboni at 8:15 AM on January 11, 2018 [22 favorites]
Fascinating
posted by Rock Steady at 8:29 AM on January 11, 2018
posted by Rock Steady at 8:29 AM on January 11, 2018
I scrolled through all of my 2017 favorites, and more than once I forgot what I was doing and tried to click a comment to favorite it.
- loquacious's story of a coworker doing "weird stoner shit" like serving hot dogs cut in half
- Quindar Beep's groaner
- madcaptenor's amusing bafflement at a quirk of the Georgia accent
- fredludd's observation about the poop emoji
- ROU_Xenophobe's Spanish pun that I was actually just trying to remember last weekend
- Ray Walston, Luck Dragon's impugning of Deanna Troi's counseling expertise
- redsparkler's link to a video that is exactly the sort of thing that makes me laugh until I cry
Rock Steady, a Ham and Salad sandwich is pretty much what it says on the tin. White or brown bread, ham, tomato, cucumber, beetroot, and (iceberg) lettuce. Your ideal version will also include grated carrot (fight me). It is a different item to a Ham, Cheese, and Salad sandwich, which you will note contains cheese.
Both varietal forms are generally available from the same vendors that might make your Burger with the Lot and Beetroot and/or Pineapple.
posted by prismatic7 at 8:59 AM on January 11, 2018 [5 favorites]
Both varietal forms are generally available from the same vendors that might make your Burger with the Lot and Beetroot and/or Pineapple.
posted by prismatic7 at 8:59 AM on January 11, 2018 [5 favorites]
Important question: is the beetroot grated, pickled or sliced and roasted?
My fav out of my favorites (sadly, too full of political posts) is by Huffy Puffy, but really needs to be read in context of the SLYT post:
This is what happens when you let the pigeon drive the bus.
posted by Hermeowne Grangepurr at 9:06 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
My fav out of my favorites (sadly, too full of political posts) is by Huffy Puffy, but really needs to be read in context of the SLYT post:
This is what happens when you let the pigeon drive the bus.
posted by Hermeowne Grangepurr at 9:06 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
The Bellman reacts to the news that that some ornithologists have very strong feelings about hyphens by helpfully interpreting it in the form most familiar to Metafilter.
posted by Eleven at 9:06 AM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by Eleven at 9:06 AM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
It is a different item to a Ham, Cheese, and Salad sandwich, which you will note contains cheese.
For completionists, Salad sandwiches are also available. No ham, no cheese, but almost certainly grated carrot.
posted by zamboni at 9:08 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
For completionists, Salad sandwiches are also available. No ham, no cheese, but almost certainly grated carrot.
posted by zamboni at 9:08 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
Sorry for the ham 'n' salad derail. Please go on with your underappreciated comments and/or sandwich toppings.
posted by Rock Steady at 9:26 AM on January 11, 2018
posted by Rock Steady at 9:26 AM on January 11, 2018
Hermeowne Grangepurr, it is both sliced and pickled, as in a Burger with the Lot and Beetroot.
I neglected to mention that your upscale variety of salad-bearing sandwiches often contain sprouts (alfalfa, rather than brussels or bean).
A pointless aside: in the 7 household, alfalfa sprouts are referred to as ‘disco pubes’. The reasons for this are obscure, but it is probably tradition, or an old charter, or something.
posted by prismatic7 at 9:28 AM on January 11, 2018 [5 favorites]
I neglected to mention that your upscale variety of salad-bearing sandwiches often contain sprouts (alfalfa, rather than brussels or bean).
A pointless aside: in the 7 household, alfalfa sprouts are referred to as ‘disco pubes’. The reasons for this are obscure, but it is probably tradition, or an old charter, or something.
posted by prismatic7 at 9:28 AM on January 11, 2018 [5 favorites]
A what sandwich?
Oh God, this is giving me flashbacks to the time that I witnessed a fellow American holding up the line at a sandwich shop in London for what felt like an eternity over the simple question, "Do you want salad on your sandwich?" Which innocent question resulted in a hideous back and forth of, "Not a salad, a sandwich!" "Right! Would you like salad on your sandwich?" "No, I want A SANDWICH." This went on for a very long time.
The vicarious mortification haunts me still, 20+ years later.
posted by merriment at 9:33 AM on January 11, 2018 [19 favorites]
Oh God, this is giving me flashbacks to the time that I witnessed a fellow American holding up the line at a sandwich shop in London for what felt like an eternity over the simple question, "Do you want salad on your sandwich?" Which innocent question resulted in a hideous back and forth of, "Not a salad, a sandwich!" "Right! Would you like salad on your sandwich?" "No, I want A SANDWICH." This went on for a very long time.
The vicarious mortification haunts me still, 20+ years later.
posted by merriment at 9:33 AM on January 11, 2018 [19 favorites]
Also, is tomato sauce ketchup?
I have tried to convince my kids, who are crazily picky eaters, that spaghetti sauce is essentially pasta ketchup.
posted by a snickering nuthatch at 11:08 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
I have tried to convince my kids, who are crazily picky eaters, that spaghetti sauce is essentially pasta ketchup.
posted by a snickering nuthatch at 11:08 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
I have tried to convince my kids, who are crazily picky eaters, that spaghetti sauce is essentially pasta ketchup.
My daughter also refuses to eat anything with tomato sauce, yet ketchup is one of her favorite food groups.
posted by zarq at 11:22 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
My daughter also refuses to eat anything with tomato sauce, yet ketchup is one of her favorite food groups.
posted by zarq at 11:22 AM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
Oh god how old are your kids please tell me this ends eventually
posted by uncleozzy at 11:25 AM on January 11, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by uncleozzy at 11:25 AM on January 11, 2018 [4 favorites]
I am humbled, grateful and still not dead.
posted by DrAstroZoom at 12:35 PM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by DrAstroZoom at 12:35 PM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
Ok, I got a lot of joy out of reading these, so here are mine:
This comment by fragmede, for introducing me to that wonderful gadget review column!
This comment by EndsOfInvention, for introducing me to that newsletter.
This comment by gusottertrout, for being spot on.
This comment by Kabanos because I thought the exact same thing while going through those survey results.
This comment by LegallyBread because how can you not love that story?!
This comment by TheWhiteSkull because that commercial is amazing and I was so happy to be reminded of its existence!
This comment by DirtyOldTown because dogs are the best.
This comment by clockwork for introducing me to NYCMesh, which I'm still working on setting up in my building.
posted by Grither at 12:58 PM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
This comment by fragmede, for introducing me to that wonderful gadget review column!
This comment by EndsOfInvention, for introducing me to that newsletter.
This comment by gusottertrout, for being spot on.
This comment by Kabanos because I thought the exact same thing while going through those survey results.
This comment by LegallyBread because how can you not love that story?!
This comment by TheWhiteSkull because that commercial is amazing and I was so happy to be reminded of its existence!
This comment by DirtyOldTown because dogs are the best.
This comment by clockwork for introducing me to NYCMesh, which I'm still working on setting up in my building.
posted by Grither at 12:58 PM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
Oh god how old are your kids please tell me this ends eventually
They're both nine.
My son loves tomato sauce, though. :)
posted by zarq at 1:35 PM on January 11, 2018
They're both nine.
My son loves tomato sauce, though. :)
posted by zarq at 1:35 PM on January 11, 2018
In semi-chronological order:
posted by capricorn at 1:50 PM on January 11, 2018 [3 favorites]
- peeedro's Harambe story
- Rhaomi uses sources to create horrifyingly convincing fake headlines (note: depressing politics content)
- migrantology provides a detailed guide to finding hyper-regional snacks in Mexico
- the whole edges2cats thread was great, but I'd like to highlight one of these days' cat-o-saurus and catcat
- all this weird-ass sports merch yessss
- byanyothername's mini-tribute to late photographer Amona Savira. She had an unusual medium.
- god help me, I laughed at Sangermaine's perfect first comment on PEPE SILVIA
- ernielundquist's review of DRAM's performance of baby llama
- furnace.heart's bat story
- lazuli predicts a potential outcome of adding a second AskMe question per week
- notyou's theoretical July best post contest post
- kamikazegopher's ball song
- eponym and predictive text rewrite a William Carlos Williams poem. (No, the OTHER one.)
- nonasuch has the best nickname for Guy Fieri's television show
- winterhill with some fresh copy
- nebulawindphone used to know a guy with the last name Sexhauer and it went basically like you would imagine
- dirtdirtdirt reminisces about when Brooklyn was weird
- Salvor Hardin introduced me to COMIC PAPYRUS which is exactly what it sounds like
- I still need to watch theatro's curated introduction to Star Trek: TOS
- TwoStride is on Very Michigan Facebook
- carter shares a Christmas greeting
posted by capricorn at 1:50 PM on January 11, 2018 [3 favorites]
seasparrow's fully funded space program!
MonkeyToes's kid with debris/de bris
posted by coppermoss at 2:54 PM on January 11, 2018
MonkeyToes's kid with debris/de bris
posted by coppermoss at 2:54 PM on January 11, 2018
DSime gave this excellent and lengthy answer to the question of how they established a personal style. (It had only 16 favorites as of this morning.) So helpful, even if I have not yet achieved Badass Dumpling.
posted by MonkeyToes at 4:12 PM on January 11, 2018
posted by MonkeyToes at 4:12 PM on January 11, 2018
merriment: "Oh God, this is giving me flashbacks to the time that I witnessed a fellow American holding up the line at a sandwich shop in London for what felt like an eternity"
My policy in restaurants in foreign countries is, if they ask me a question I don't understand, I just say, "Yes." I can manage to eat whatever happens to my food, and I've probably learned something in the process.
posted by Chrysostom at 7:58 PM on January 11, 2018 [9 favorites]
My policy in restaurants in foreign countries is, if they ask me a question I don't understand, I just say, "Yes." I can manage to eat whatever happens to my food, and I've probably learned something in the process.
posted by Chrysostom at 7:58 PM on January 11, 2018 [9 favorites]
- nubs scores a sick burn on George Lucas and Anakin Skywalker but not as harsh as the burn Obi-wan scored (scroll up to the previous comment for context).
- If over-the-top beanplating is your thing, this thread about Toad, of Super Mario Brothers, is filled with underappreciated gems.
- poffin boffin requests something a little less sweet.
- Harvey Kilobit makes a delightfully stupid joke.
- number offers the only appropriate response to "never played Chrono Trigger."
In a post in a Dr. Who thread Grangousier described the music of classic Doctor Who as "performed by atonal woodwind and untuned oscillator". Last year at the gamera household we had a doctor who watching marathon and every once in a while one of us would say "Here come the atonal woodwinds" or "There's that untuned oscillator" and we'd all crack up.
posted by gamera at 8:50 PM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by gamera at 8:50 PM on January 11, 2018 [2 favorites]
Wow, I don't think I've been called it in metatalk before! Thanks, librarylis.
posted by medusa at 9:36 PM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by medusa at 9:36 PM on January 11, 2018 [1 favorite]
urbanwhaleshark on the Gowanus Canal
valkane and the cosmic horror of Cracker Barrel
posted by equalpants at 10:24 PM on January 11, 2018
valkane and the cosmic horror of Cracker Barrel
posted by equalpants at 10:24 PM on January 11, 2018
> EmpressCallipygos: cakelite ended up with an interesting takeaway after reading James Herriot as a child.
cakelite's comment: Oh, and if he likes animals I totally second the James Herriot books, I devoured them at that age. It has also left me with a lifelong impression that large animal vets spend most of their time with half their arm up a cow.
As a child in the 1980s, I was addicted to James Herriot's books, and can confirm that this takeaway is 100% true. Decades later, I am working for a publisher which is (to my delight) reissuing a number of James Herriot titles. In honour of the above-described lifelong impression, I made sure, when writing the first synopsis, to incorporate a quote including "my arm deep inside the straining cow".
My father once told me of a newspaper cartoon he'd seen, depicting a farmer standing behind a cow - farmer bent over, holding the cow's tail aloft, and bellowing into the internal depths of the animal: "D'YE WANT A CUPPA TEA IN THERE, MR. 'ERRIOT?"
posted by Morfil Ffyrnig at 2:55 AM on January 12, 2018 [24 favorites]
cakelite's comment: Oh, and if he likes animals I totally second the James Herriot books, I devoured them at that age. It has also left me with a lifelong impression that large animal vets spend most of their time with half their arm up a cow.
As a child in the 1980s, I was addicted to James Herriot's books, and can confirm that this takeaway is 100% true. Decades later, I am working for a publisher which is (to my delight) reissuing a number of James Herriot titles. In honour of the above-described lifelong impression, I made sure, when writing the first synopsis, to incorporate a quote including "my arm deep inside the straining cow".
My father once told me of a newspaper cartoon he'd seen, depicting a farmer standing behind a cow - farmer bent over, holding the cow's tail aloft, and bellowing into the internal depths of the animal: "D'YE WANT A CUPPA TEA IN THERE, MR. 'ERRIOT?"
posted by Morfil Ffyrnig at 2:55 AM on January 12, 2018 [24 favorites]
I had to explain to an American friend visiting that it was irrelevant that Heinz labelled the bottles "ketchup", it was pronounced "tomato sauce" and if you said anything else you'd sound like a total wanker. Basically the k e t c h u p are all silent.
It makes perfect sense here.
posted by kitten magic at 6:42 AM on January 12, 2018 [3 favorites]
It makes perfect sense here.
posted by kitten magic at 6:42 AM on January 12, 2018 [3 favorites]
Namlit, I'd never seen the actual cartoon anywhere, only remembered my dad's description of it! Thanks for that! :D
posted by Morfil Ffyrnig at 6:55 AM on January 12, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Morfil Ffyrnig at 6:55 AM on January 12, 2018 [1 favorite]
Capri: My daughter named it Steve.
rifflesby: I quit after nearly two years of daily play because some bastard gorilla built his house in the middle of the chessboard lawn.
blue_beetle: It's like Christmas is just around the corner. But instead of presents under the tree, you'll find a corpse. Only it will be yours. But, you won't find it, because you'll be dead.
posted by sunset in snow country at 2:54 PM on January 12, 2018 [1 favorite]
rifflesby: I quit after nearly two years of daily play because some bastard gorilla built his house in the middle of the chessboard lawn.
blue_beetle: It's like Christmas is just around the corner. But instead of presents under the tree, you'll find a corpse. Only it will be yours. But, you won't find it, because you'll be dead.
posted by sunset in snow country at 2:54 PM on January 12, 2018 [1 favorite]
I have a good friend whose father is English, and as a child she spent a lot of time with relatives in England. Several years ago, when one of my kids--Word Boy--was nine and just developing his talent for smart-assery, we visited her. Word Boy and S have always been very close, and on this trip, among the things they did was grill us a delicious meal including homemade hamburger buns.
Here is a Facebook post from that visit:
S has been amusing us by telling us the names for things in England. For instance, in England they call ketchup "red sauce" and steak sauce "brown sauce."
So, on Saturday, WB came in carrying his swordfish steak and sat down at the table to eat. "How did you cook it?" I asked. "Did you put anything on it?"
WB said, "We used lime and soy sauce. That's called 'magic sauce' in England."
Me and Uncle Scott: "Wow, really?"
WB, pityingly: "No."
posted by Orlop at 3:14 PM on January 12, 2018 [4 favorites]
Here is a Facebook post from that visit:
S has been amusing us by telling us the names for things in England. For instance, in England they call ketchup "red sauce" and steak sauce "brown sauce."
So, on Saturday, WB came in carrying his swordfish steak and sat down at the table to eat. "How did you cook it?" I asked. "Did you put anything on it?"
WB said, "We used lime and soy sauce. That's called 'magic sauce' in England."
Me and Uncle Scott: "Wow, really?"
WB, pityingly: "No."
posted by Orlop at 3:14 PM on January 12, 2018 [4 favorites]
I just read everything linked in this thread and it was lovely. Thanks all.
posted by medusa at 5:38 PM on January 12, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by medusa at 5:38 PM on January 12, 2018 [4 favorites]
This one is a bit sideways, but Rykey's comment in the resetting politics thread expectations MetaTalk that dubbed the megathreads "Threadamari Damacy" struck me as so hilarious, charming, and apropos that I created a Threadamari Damacy emoji for the staff slack so when you type :politics_thread: you get yourself a king vomiting rainbows. And it only has 8 favorites!
tobascodagama, From their website to God's eyeballs.
sukeban: In Spain we got our presents on January 6 from the Three Wise Men/ Los Reyes Magos. Who of course have their bones preserved in the cathedral of Cologne, Germany. So, eh, whatever. We're used to get[ting] presents from undead lich kings because Catholicism is like that. (TRUTH)
ActingTheGoat had a moment of utter brilliance about Chicago GOP hack columnist John "Jack" Kass.
lucidium: Our toaster just has five monotone beeps, which I believe is it announcing OW. OW. TOAST. IS. DONE.
Okay I'll have to do the other half of the year later, I get back to the summer and suddenly it's just me favoriting every comment that mentions Tormund Giantsbane and/or shiptruthers.
posted by Eyebrows McGee (staff) at 9:17 PM on January 12, 2018 [7 favorites]
tobascodagama, From their website to God's eyeballs.
sukeban: In Spain we got our presents on January 6 from the Three Wise Men/ Los Reyes Magos. Who of course have their bones preserved in the cathedral of Cologne, Germany. So, eh, whatever. We're used to get[ting] presents from undead lich kings because Catholicism is like that. (TRUTH)
ActingTheGoat had a moment of utter brilliance about Chicago GOP hack columnist John "Jack" Kass.
lucidium: Our toaster just has five monotone beeps, which I believe is it announcing OW. OW. TOAST. IS. DONE.
Okay I'll have to do the other half of the year later, I get back to the summer and suddenly it's just me favoriting every comment that mentions Tormund Giantsbane and/or shiptruthers.
posted by Eyebrows McGee (staff) at 9:17 PM on January 12, 2018 [7 favorites]
mudpuppie survived an attack by a killer turkey, and we should all be grateful
Apparently that comment was prescient. Just yesterday I was involved in a road rage incident with triplet turkeys who stood in front of my car as I entered a traffic circle. (They did the raging after I tried to shoo them, at which point I dove back behind the wheel and managed to get the door closed before they came and stood next to my window and gave me the stinkeye with all six eyes.)
posted by mudpuppie at 10:45 AM on January 13, 2018 [9 favorites]
Apparently that comment was prescient. Just yesterday I was involved in a road rage incident with triplet turkeys who stood in front of my car as I entered a traffic circle. (They did the raging after I tried to shoo them, at which point I dove back behind the wheel and managed to get the door closed before they came and stood next to my window and gave me the stinkeye with all six eyes.)
posted by mudpuppie at 10:45 AM on January 13, 2018 [9 favorites]
My first mention. *tears up*
It seems peeing in the sink has its advantages...
posted by Too-Ticky at 2:00 PM on January 13, 2018 [2 favorites]
It seems peeing in the sink has its advantages...
posted by Too-Ticky at 2:00 PM on January 13, 2018 [2 favorites]
gave me the stinkeye with all six eyes
Per turkey, no wonder you were scared!
posted by Celsius1414 at 4:44 PM on January 13, 2018 [1 favorite]
Per turkey, no wonder you were scared!
posted by Celsius1414 at 4:44 PM on January 13, 2018 [1 favorite]
The World Famous's comment which in part imagines some dialogue for Tarantino's take on Star Trek.
"You see this tricorder? This tricorder was first purchased by your great-grandfather during the first conflict with the Klingons. It was bought in a little commissary at the Starfleet Academy on Earth. Made by the first company ever to make tricorders. Up until then, people just carried three different corders."
I'm cackling at it now as much as I did the first time I read it.
posted by I'm always feeling, Blue at 5:54 PM on January 13, 2018 [5 favorites]
"You see this tricorder? This tricorder was first purchased by your great-grandfather during the first conflict with the Klingons. It was bought in a little commissary at the Starfleet Academy on Earth. Made by the first company ever to make tricorders. Up until then, people just carried three different corders."
I'm cackling at it now as much as I did the first time I read it.
posted by I'm always feeling, Blue at 5:54 PM on January 13, 2018 [5 favorites]
I can't believe I missed that Australian hamburger thread, I feel like I am going to do an anxiety vomit into my own mammoth feeling of disappointment.
posted by turbid dahlia at 6:44 PM on January 14, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by turbid dahlia at 6:44 PM on January 14, 2018 [1 favorite]
Every year I CTRL-F my name in these threads and get excited for a couple of seconds...and then realize it's just the default name display I get on every page. Sigh.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 1:32 AM on January 15, 2018 [16 favorites]
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 1:32 AM on January 15, 2018 [16 favorites]
davejay's shaggy dog story and brundlefly's response.
posted by Navelgazer at 1:17 PM on January 15, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Navelgazer at 1:17 PM on January 15, 2018 [1 favorite]
I'm a big fan of ActingTheGoat's summary of Millennial-panic stories.
bigbigdog comes in with a very strong pun.
I'm surprised quinndexter's Arrested Development reference didn't get more love.
posted by He Is Only The Imposter at 1:13 PM on January 23, 2018
bigbigdog comes in with a very strong pun.
I'm surprised quinndexter's Arrested Development reference didn't get more love.
posted by He Is Only The Imposter at 1:13 PM on January 23, 2018
...and suddenly, it occurs to me that perhaps Bayes' theorem could be communicated with a short stage play.posted by tilde at 5:17 PM on January 27, 2018
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imagine her embarrassment
posted by roger ackroyd at 12:04 PM on June 4, 2017 [11 favorites −]
posted by ellieBOA at 12:44 AM on January 10, 2018 [4 favorites]